Monday, 7 May 2012

Waking up from the Dream

Four experiences.

I was late for work. 30 minutes to be precise. At the top of my roads mini hill, I got off my cycle as I had decided to walk the narrow passage way between the school fence and high wall. Where upon I noticed at the entrance of the path a brown mass moving. It looked sticky with leaves stuck on the top. I stopped and bent down. A huge Toad. Now believe it or not. Even with all my travels and walks this is the first time I had seen a Toad in person. Well I thought that's amazing. In the middle of London. I then entered the pathway to notice another toad. Behind this Toad mating toads one on top of the other, following the other one. Behind these two another. And so on. I immediately realised one does not mess with the Toad. For this reason Toads must be named by a capital T. For they are royalty. Anyway, I swiftly left them to their private business, not wanting to disturb, confident they would safely find their destination.
Later cycling back home, at a busy cross-roads, above the noise of cars I heard the ribbeting of a frog. How was that possible to hear this natural sound above so much noise? Now I thought this is getting ridiculous.

I decided to take a walk on Hampstead Heath. This was not easy as I had battle with the voice inside saying I was bored of walking on the Heath. I knew it and besides it was over populated by people. It wasn't 'wild enough'. None the less I had urged myself on and had managed to get myself to the edge of the Heath via the village. With my mind chattering I noticed that I was walking against the tide. In a slight rain mist, the after lunch time strollers were walking back home to the village. Great, less people I thought and then sighed at myself for having this thought. Oh well onwards. I know I will visit the huge Old Oak Tree by the pond. After sitting against the tree I searched for other Oaks surrounding this one. Sadly I found none and then put out a question. Where to next. And the answer came back the tree near to the bench above the lake.
It was only after the fourth tree that I then realised that I was walking the heath guided by the trees. It was at that moment that I felt lost. And at that moment I realised I had escaped the cage of my chattering. I was walking the heath by root and branch. Not by the human map. I was venturing deeper. Each tree with so much to share. So much witnessed. Each tree interlinked. After following the trees I found myself on the green grass expanse. I found I could trace the line I had walked by the thread pulling me backwards from my heart to the Old Oak Tree. I tested myself. Could I trace this thread from the Old Oak Tree to me. I could not. This knowledge could only be traced from my heart back along the thread. I had managed to silence my head and had found my heart. In fact I was not lost at all.

I had my friends the Bears ~ S and C Bear over the weekend. Neither familiar with London I took them to my local wood Highgate first and Queenswood second. In this order as I was curious to see how much the Bears experience mirrored mine. I remarked how extraordinary it is that this once one woodland now separated from the road, has such completely different atmospheres and characters. The Bears noticed this immediately. Where the first one had lots of space between the trees , with a green open expanse in the middle and being more or less flat. Queenswood {S Bear remarked Queen being female this was of little surprise}with winding paths, twisted tangled trees and a bare space in the middle labelled Witches Coven. We walked on and circled a protected partial fenced area. We were transported to the land of dinosaurs. Ancient. I felt so small. As we walked rat after rat ran in front of our path. One or two rats I thought would have been not surprising. But we had now lost count. Besides were there rats in the time of dinosaurs?.

Yesterday on the bus to Muswell Hill with carefully labelled envelopes for the charity shop with jewellery I had made with semi-precious stones. I was excited to be giving away this treasures. I was sitting above and just behind a mother with her baby boy. I'm not very good at distinguishing whether baby's are boys or girls but I decided yes this was a boy. Healthy fat red cheeks. Bit bored. His attentive mother shifted the angle of his pram so he could observe the world more. Now he was happy. We caught each others eye a few times. I wasn't interested just a baby I thought. After looking around the bus he looked at me and I was aghast. With a cheeky flirtatious grin he twinkled at me
 "Go on I dare you"
"Ha ha got ya!"
"Yes you have! Oh my God!".
And he looked away. For those few moments this was no baby. But a man teasing me. And then that man was gone. Instead a baby.
Now I'm used to sensing old souls. And I'm used to babies and toddlers inquisitiveness with me. But this. This was different. I wasn't sure whether I had glimpsed the man that was or would be.

One could find many meanings in all these events. Look into the symbolism of Toads and rats. Read up on rainbow, purple children or reincarnation. Read up on Earth energy lines, Tree Divas or dowsing. Read up on quantum physics and time travel. But for me it is how those experiences felt at the time. How I feel privileged and gifted. I imagine some would say like a child. I love how children can be 'lost' in fascination. Not worrying about time and the 'next to do thing on the list'. Time opens up and with that the possibilities of experiencing and feeling more.

I can remember that when I have been 'late' I have usually bumped into someone I haven't seen for a long while or experience wonders like the migration of the Toad. When I noticed that I had 'lost my mind' on the Heath I chuckled to myself. Usually that is a phrase associated with madness. But for me I felt my experience was akin to those moments in meditation where after a few blissful seconds of being in the moment. My mind has gone only to find myself/my mind chattering again.

Each of these moments were profound. I would describe these experiences as being part of a window into an expanded conscious state. Outside the limitations of the ego mind. Some might describe this as a Shamanic or Magical state of being. My friend Reya encapsulates it with this question "If this was a dream what would it mean?"


Amber said...

Love this post! Full of wonderful gifts and adventures... definite wanderings in the dream-world, lovely that this is reality too!

Silver Fox said...

Thank you Amber :o)