Secret Garden

Home is where the Heart is

2012-02-14T17:53:00.011Z

"One of the following is true:

Every breath you take contains an atom breathed out by Marilyn Monroe

There is a liquid that can run uphill

You age faster at the top of a building than at the bottom

An atom can be in many different places at once, the equivalent of you being in New York and London at the same time

The entire human race would fit in the volume of a sugar cub

One per cent of the static on a television tuned between stations is the relic of the Big Bang

Time travel is not forbidden by the laws of physics

A cup of coffee weighs more when it is hot than when it is cold

The faster you travel, the slimmer you get.

No, I'm joking. They are all true!" ( 'Quantum Theory Cannot Hurt You' by M. Chown)

Since Friday my attention has been drawn to the same question/dilemma from 3 different sources. First was on Friday http://www.diaryofapsychichealer.com/ and the question whether mythical beings were real. Second was on a Shamanic workshop last Saturday where one attendee was caught in the struggle around questioning whether his experiences were just his imaginings and lastly was today on the blog http://greenmanramblings.blogspot.com/ where the post introduced the experience/idea of being able to commune/communicate and have intimate relationships with plants. So what is real?

I have walked along various disciplines and paths. Some paths I have skipped along. Some I have ventured on briefly, others I return to again and again. These paths have included various disciplines within the vast umbrella of Buddhism, Shamanism, Paganism, Anthropology, Psychology, Psychic studies, New Age, Feminism and Radical Politics. I have found that having this range of explorations creates its own momentum of being open and curious. Discovering new ideas and experiences and finding old ones refreshed and vitalised. The negative is that I can struggle in trying to find parallel contexts and interpretations when visiting these different worlds. The danger or challenge can lead to being misunderstood and at worse marginalised.

If for instance I have an experience under the 'Shamanic' umbrella and I try to share my experience within a Psychological context or Psychic context; there is not necessarily an equivalent experience within those worlds. Even if the experience might be known in the different worlds there is not a shared understanding or language. Not only can this be rather frustrating for both parties but this has created confusion and conflict within myself. Because if certain experiences are misunderstood or marginalisation this can lead to denial of the experience. This is a loss. Loss of the self and the soul's voice. This can even occur with those of non malicious intent. Because we are all conditioned by the environment ~ our families and our societies into belief structures and behaviours. We take them on consciously and unconsciously.

During this weekend I was able to put this struggle down. For I found a person who weaves different disciplines together. Not so they become a grey mush. But a wonderful tapestry with the colours vibrating and singing more vibrantly. And the dilemma ~ what is real? No longer matters. I found myself beginning to wonder whether what the Buddhists have been referring to about this world not being real could be actually making sense to me.

This was extraordinary and rare opportunity for me to hear from a woman from Native American and European descent ~ Patricia White Buffalo ~ sharing her perspective on prejudice and persecution. She said the persecution of the Native Americans from the White Europeans was foremost about Land ownership. While for the White Europeans on White Europeans ~ Christians persecution of Pagans ~ it was about occupation of our souls ~ beliefs. For this reason White Europeans have more fear around Shamanism. We have more fear buried in our bodies about being in our bodies and are disconnected to the land and Spirit.

When I wasn't putting my full will, intention, attention and heart into being more in my body; I stared and soaked in the experience of a person connected to her body, fully present and connected to the earth. The only other person who I have experienced as having this, was with Barry Brailsford who works with the Maori. At one point Patricia White Buffalo said if you have never known the experience of being in your body grounded and connected, then you don't know what you are seeking. Now that is true loss and is tragic. Without being truly present, in one's body, connected to the earth then one is not able to connect with Spirit. One is homeless and isolated. Like a tree the further the roots go down the further the branches reach up.

Not only are we battling against the weight of societies historical oppression, but many of us have and are battling with traumas in childhood. And this is not surprising as both are interlinked for violence whether in the home our outside are reflections of each other. This cocktail blocks our senses. The body shuts down partially or totally some or many senses of smell, taste, hearing, sight and touch. We learn to filter out experience like annoying sounds. They become background noise. Such as the sound of a barking deer in the night which would be an annoyance because we would be kept awake and tired for work. Or like when we discuss law suites with our neighbours because they cut the fence down when it was on their right side not their left. Both sides ignoring the plight of the nesting birds.

So many of us are only partially experiencing and are not fully present then the questions of whether stones feel, do plants have souls, are there faeries at the bottom of the garden, are Unicorns made up fantasies, or do trees sing become ridiculous. Childhood tales. But, what if these experiences were not metaphors, collective unconscious beliefs or superstitions? How can we know the answer when we do not have the understanding, the language and are weighed down by beliefs, and fears of oppression which we carry in our cells and memories? The dilemma and the solution is that this numbness not only protects us from feeling the pain from our own personal and collective histories but also our pleasures, joys and gifts. And solution is found through the gentle breath of compassion, love and trust soflty fanning the flame buried deep in the secret chamber of the heart. I believe this flame is always there. Can never be put out.

Where does magic and science begin and start? How many people does it take for shared experiences to become real and not mass shared hallucinations? We believe there are energy waves that carry information which we don't hear. Because we all turn on our radios and outcomes sounds which we all verify as the same. That's not magic but science. Could it not be both magical and science? Could not our imaginings also be reality? Where are the lines between thought, meaningful stare and words spoken?........

1. Quantum Theory Cannot Hurt You. A Guide to the Universe. By Marcus Chown.

2. Patricia White Buffalo. BeHeavenOnEarth.com

Colour of Snow

2012-02-05T21:36:00.010Z

Journey to the Moon

2012-02-05T20:14:00.009Z

Blanket of snow on ground, sky,

White grey wrap muffling noise.

So stilled, quiet, ready to feel.
Creaking scratch of my eyes.

Heavy in body I arrive.
So this is me remembering childish wonder

How cold is it in space?
Is it colder than the Arctic in midwinder?

Then I remember we walked on the moon and survived.
And didn't die of the cold. Or die of the wonder.

That's if you believe we did actually go to the moon....

Bee Dancer : Bee Queen

2012-01-31T22:24:00.000Z

Becoming Ferrell & remembering ~ I too like this Land have lost parts of myself

2011-12-24T20:35:00.003Z

Mistletoe

2011-12-20T20:30:00.024Z

A holiday postcard circa 1900 from wikipidea

Yesterday evening 5pm misty cold London evening, while being swept along in London Bridge train station crowd; I overheard a woman on her mobile complaining about her friend being 'bah humbug'. I exclaimed to myself 'just coos I don't celebrate Christmas don't assume I am being a 'kill joy'. Ah ha me thought ~ an opportunity for change. For healing.
Like many I have found this time a challenge. It is reminder that I cannot force fit my childhood family into the 'perfect ideal' pictured in Western Society's idea of Christmas. So I have felt lost. Left out in the cold. I have spent Xmas on my own for over 20 years, years I have tried to block from my memory. Far from a time of celebration of being with loved ones a time for appreciation and sharing. I have found myself facing the cul-de-sac labelled 'what is wrong with me'?

And despite feeling envious this has not stopped me appreciating others sharing the joy of each other ~ giving and receiving, nurturing, celebration, gorgeous food, Light and Fun.

But what i don't 'get' is the commercialisation and the ever increasing sell sell of expensive gifts ~ especially for children. There is the pressure to conform to an idea of how a family is to be.

I wonder if I had a different childhood and family would I be thinking the same? Or would I be focusing on the preparations. Looking forward to being with my family even though they do get on my nerves! It would be within acceptable annoyance. And the positives would out way the negatives.

So, I do not want to be linked with 'bah humbug' though I struggle with my own loss of that warmth at this time of dark and cold. Instead of remaining conflicted I begin to realize that yet again as I walk on the edge I have choice. No need to drown in the waters of shame. Nor do I go along with others or 'societies' expectations. I am working on choice. What can, and do I want this time to be. What can it be. So, little by little I dare to be more present. Open to possibility. Because I have loss means I can appreciate so much.

Today I brought mistletoe which is hanging in my doorway. For 2 years I have had a growing awareness to this magical plant. So I choose this as an opportunity to connect more with the 'medicine' and spirit.
Mistletoe's name is anglo-saxon in origin ~ 'mistle' means dung and 'tan' is the word for twig. So mistletoe means dung-on-a-twig (1).
"Shakespeare referred to it as the 'baleful Mistletoe', from the Scandinavian legend the Balder, the God of Peace, was slain with an arrow made of mistletoe. He was restored to life of the request of the other Gods and Goddesses and Mistletoe was afterwards given into the keeping of the Goddess of Love, and it was ordained that anyone who passed under it should receive a kiss, to show the branch had become an emblem of love, and not of hate." (1)
There are various myths such as linking Mistletoe to birds as some believed it grew from birds dung or that due to it not growing from soil it was heaven sent. Many believe it was sacred to the Celtic druids and some believe it was used in shamanic practices. Neither plant or herb. In between ~ a gatekeeper between the worlds.
"Basically: The mistletoe does not care for earth or sky, it grows the way it wants and lingers outside all rhythms and laws of terrestrial growth. Some examples: it does not care for day or night, top or bottom, summer or winter, laws of gravitation, linear laws (spatial extent)." (2)
The name also apparently means "the one that heals everything" (3) ~ powerful medicine in deed. Mistletoe's Medicinal/Remedial Properties and Lore are many: Antispasmodic, cardiac, cytostatic, diuretic, emmengogue, haemostat, hypotensive, narcotic, nervine, stimulant, tonic, vasodilator. (4)
"In 50 C.E., the Greek physician Dioscorides wrote his Materia Medica, establishing himself a place in medical history. As one of the ancient world's most knowledgeable herbalists, Dioscorides found that mistletoe helped cure his patients of external tumors. He wrote that it “has the power to disperse, soften, drawing and assisting tumors of the parotid gland and other lesions…” Some forty or so years later, Pliny the Elder wrote of the treatment of sores and epilepsy with mistletoe in his Natural History. He also described its use in magic and ritual" (4)
In the 1920's Rudolf Steiner became interested in Mistletoe and since then has been used as treatment for Cancer. According to Steinerhealth.org various studies have shown Mistletoe to have several benefits in the treatment of Cancer. (5)
It's magical properties include drawing love, protection and banishing evil spirits. Not surprising then it is meant to aid in peaceful sleep. (6)
Mistletoe from my investigations I realize, has been and remains powerful; still integral to so many's ritual even though not everyone might be aware of it's healing properties or its links with myth, history, folklore and spiritual beliefs. It is linked with Winter Solstice ~ the Pagan New Year. Time to remember and celebrate new life.

So for me what can I celebrate. I am not out in the cold. I am no longer homeless either physically or emotionally. As the shortest day draws near I remember the richness and abundance that lies warm in the dark earth. I am reminded of the abundance in my life ~ so many gifts that are part of me which I share with others, the rich memories that have given birth to dear connections and shared loves. So I give thanks to the gifts of Mistletoe that aid me in my dreams of past, present and future. I acknowledge and ask for ingenuity, strength, endurance protection, abundance, creativity and love.

(1) http://www.cancersalves.com/botanical_approaches/individual_herbs/mistletoe.html
(2) http://www.mistel.at/mistel/mistel_en.htm#Einführung
(3)http://www.vitasophie.com/mistletoe.htm

(4) http://paganwiccan.about.com/od/yulethelongestnight/p/Mistletoe_Myths.htm
(5) http://www.steinerhealth.org/programs/cancer-treatment/
(6) http://www.shee-eire.com/Herbs,Trees&Fungi/Herbs/Mistletoe/Factsheet1.htm

and so they grew feet legs wings....

2011-12-11T15:12:00.008Z

Burning our way to Power

2011-11-28T22:20:00.008Z

by gloriagypsy @ deviantart.com

"The soul is here to live its joy. The uninitiated ego is here to keep things familiar, safe and predictable. Which path will you choose?"[1]

"Carl whose favourate passtime was to go to the park on a sunny afternoon, sit down on his bench, and bask in the solar rays. One day as he sat quietly on his bench [wearing his business suit], a large man wearing a uniform and heavy boots came and stood in front of him, blocking the sun. Being a peaceful sort of guy who did not like to make trouble, Carl merely moved over on the park bench so he could once again feel the sun's rays on his face.

No sooner did he move than the uniformed man moved again to block the sun. Carl moved again. So did the man. At this point, Carl spoke up and politely asked the man to move aside. The man did not. Carl, getting angry now, tried to push him aside. The man pushed him back on the bench and, with his heavy boot, stepped on Carl's foot and mashed it into the ground. Carl, very angry now, began to scream obscenities, flailing his arms at the man and yelling for help.

But his crying was in vain. No one came to his rescue. When Carl lifed his head and looked around, he suddenly saw why. He saw that each person in the park had a uniformed man standing in front of them. Many had boots stepping on their toes, while others were chained to their benches. Most people on the benches were passively sitting still, some were quietly reading, while others turned to stare at Carl disapprovingly, scorning his childish and uncooperative outburst. None of the others were complaining about the man on their foot - why should Carl? Their outrage was aimed not at the man in the uniform but at Carl. He was living the self they had long since rejected.

This is where the story ends, but we can all guess at the possible outcomes. Did Carl continue to yell and scream only to be chained to his bench with the key in someone else's possession? Did he give up his rebellion and learn to sit quietly and passively like his neighbours? Did he rally support and create an uprising in the park? Did he transform his jailer? What would you have done?

We are held in our places within a culture where the personal loss of power is so epidemic that no one hears the cries of loss and outrage. Instead we are ostracized for acts of individuality, or, at best, feared. To keep our power over others, we often give up our freedom and authenticity, and conform to expectations. This is a terrible loss, for it obscures the unique divinity within ourselves that contains the seeds of evolution and transformation. Those who have made this sacrifice expect others to do the same and become highly offended when they do not. Straight men in their gray suits may be offended by flamboyantly dressed gay men. The obedient wife is offended by the militant feminism of her daughter. War veterans are offended by those who march for peace.

In the wake of this loss, we have a civilization so obsessed with its loss of power that is spends enormous amounts of money and energy creating the shadow of power through warfare and technology. We have complied with the master, internalized controller, and beomce accomplices in a polarized society whose main goal is to control more with less. Numb to the pain, numb to our own powerlessness, numb to the repetitive tasks believed necessary for our physical survival, we live with the emptiness inside ourselves. Empty inside, our cultural myth tells us that power lies outside of ourselves in the approval of others, in technological gadgets, or through a distant and authoritarian god. Thus we deplete ourselves, our resources, and our planet, reaching for a power outside, a power over, a power that will only enslave us"[2]

[1] Soulcraft. Chapter 13. Living As if your place in the World mattered. Page 325. By Bill Plotkin.
[2] Eastern Body, Western Mind. Chakra Three Burning our way to Power. Truamas and Abuses. Page 189-190. By Anodea Judith.

from a Spiritual Activist

2011-11-14T22:54:00.002Z

picture by burning~liquid

*
A SPIRITUAL CONSPIRACY ~
author unknown or one could say origin from source
...
On the surface of the world right now there is
mayhem and violence and things seem dark.
But calmly and quietly, at the same time,
something else is happening underground
An inner revolution is taking place
and certain individuals are being called to a higher light.
It is a silent revolution.
From the inside out. From the ground up.
This is a Global operation.
A Spiritual Conspiracy.
We are in every nation on the planet.
You won't see us on the T. V.
You won't read about us in the newspaper
You won't hear about us on the radio
We don't seek any glory
We don't wear any uniform
We come in all shapes and sizes, colors and styles
Most of us work anonymously
We are quietly working behind the scenes
in every country and culture of the world
Cities big and small, mountains and valleys,
in farms and villages, tribes and remote islands
You could pass by one of us on the street
and not even notice.
*
We go undercover
We remain behind the scenes
It is of no concern to us who takes the final credit
But simply that the Work gets done
Occasionally we spot each other in the street
We give a quiet nod and continue on our way
During the day many of us pretend we have normal jobs
But behind the false storefront at night
is where the real work takes a place
*
We are slowly creating a new world
with the power of our minds and hearts
We follow, with passion and joy
Our Orders;
*
We are dropping soft, secret love bombs when no one is looking
Prayers ~ Poems ~ Hugs ~ Music ~ Photography ~ Movies ~ Kind words ~
Smiles ~ Meditation and prayer ~ Dance ~ Social activism ~ Websites
Blogs ~ Random acts of kindness...
We each express ourselves in our own unique ways
with our own unique gifts and talents
We are the change we want to see in the world
*
We know it is the only way real transformation takes place
We know that quietly and humbly we have the
power of all the oceans combined;
Our work is slow and meticulous
Like the formation of mountains
It is not even visible at first glance
And yet with it entire tectonic plates
shall be moved in the centuries to come.
Love is the new religion of the 21st century
It cannot be taught, only caught.
*
It comes from the intelligence of our heart
And the fire of our soul
*
Embedded in the timeless evolutionary pulse of all human beings
We are the change we want to see in the world
Only we can do it
*
Perhaps you have already joined us
*
All are welcome
The door is open

2011-11-06T22:55:00.001Z

2011-10-30T13:05:00.001Z

Holkham ~ Norfolk

2011-10-25T09:36:00.022+01:00

Seagull high in Sky.

Sands breathing in Dragons Breath.

Anchored through infinity Sky, Sand and Sea

Our bodies mirror the Curve of the Earth

Still

Opening

Liebster Blog Award

2011-10-07T20:39:00.007+01:00

Thank you to Laurel for including me in her 5 for this award.

Liebster is beloved in German...be loved...I am reminded of Rumi and Sufism. The beloved is the other, you and the Divine. You see yourself and love reflected in another eyes.

I am passing this award onto these 5 blogs who give me so much:

* Laurel's Reflections
* Amber Caspian
* Crashingly Beautiful
* Moonroot
* Chateau 7

For those receiving this award, there are a few guidelines:

* Thank the giver and link back to the blogger who gave it to you.
* Reveal your top 5 picks and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog.
* Copy and paste the award on your blog.
* Have faith that your followers will link with other bloggers.
* And most of all – blog to your heart’s delight!

There is no need to pass this on to anyone if you are not so inclined. Just an opportunity to share :o)

Bon Iver - Holocene (Official Music Video)

2011-09-26T20:29:00.000+01:00

2011-09-11T23:22:00.001+01:00

from http://pinterest.com

re~blogged from Sacred Graffiti

Learning to Listen

2011-09-05T19:37:00.026+01:00

Blackthorn ~ Prunus spinosa

Over the years I have been learning to listen to where my attention is drawn. This can come through any of the senses. I have also found that not only are my senses drawn in a particular direction but this also accompanies a strong desire or attraction. It can feel akin to feeling hungry, to having a nagging thought that doesn't go away or wanting to listen to a particular piece of music. When we have those desires hopefully we don't dismiss or ignore them. I have learnt that so many gifts come from including these messages.

This late August into early September I have noticed Blackthorn with their blue/purple berries ~ otherwise known as sloe which can be made into Jam, Wine or a health tonic. Why had I not been aware of this tree and their fruits before? Unfamiliar they looked edible and I had a strong desire to eat them. But I thought better not... Just in case. I put my curiosity aside. However, the curiosity grew into fascination and I kept seeing more. I looked the tree up and identified it as Blackthorn. On my return to home I searched some more. And as I found out the properties of Blackthorn realized that there is a reason why I was drawn to this tree at this specific time. And I am thankful that I have learnt to listen to those messages. Years ago these messages were more often a faint whisper and infrequent. Now they come louder, more diverse and as such are not out of the ordinary.

I have trusted in my process of listening. However, I have found in today's world this way is not so easily trusted. From school I was taught that to learn meant memorising other's interpretations and quoting them in order to pass the tests. My own interpretations were discouraged especially if they did not fit. Schooling was not about learning to perceive, to be inquisitive, to ask questions. It was about becoming memory banks. Unfortunately I found this also carried on into Art College where only certain styles and philosophical approaches were acceptable.

It is a delicate balance between following, learning tools, techniques and being prescriptive. We now have an abundance of books that illustrate the ways, whys, because, hows, whens etc. We have increasing number of competing workshop leaders who offer courses that lead to certifications. It is wonderful that there is so much choice, experience, knowledge and more acceptance of Esoteric, Metaphysical, Alternative Spirituality and Pagan fields. However, I would also add that an over reliance on following a style of learning which is more 'painting by numbers' can stifle the magic and mystery to discovery of each person's unique individuation process. There is a danger of our own selves and process being lost in the experts experience.

In the past I too often found that I became lost in anothers journey resulting in feelings of intimidation and inadequacy. When entering anothers neatly summarized presentation of their journey we don't see the full process that person underwent. We might not realize what wonders of creativity lies in our Secret Garden that follow the dark nights of our soul. Getting lost is part of the journey, in fact is a necessity. To quote C. G. Jung " The right way to wholeness is made up of fateful detours and wrong turnings". For me a wise teacher is one that does not live by this old model of delivering lots of techniques, tasks, models and theory ~ that can prove their value. But who facilities space for others to explore and be held in that process. Many are speaking of 2012 the year where many will awaken. I believe this is about acknowledging where we are already. It is not the few leading the many.

Learning to listen for me is about discerning. I have found that I frequently discard layers of mis-information so that I can tune into the deeper messages. Is there another voice that says eat some spinach and not more chocolate?! Or "Cross to the others side of the road NOW!" which happened to me twice where upon not listening I was set upon by a gang and harrassed by another the other time. Now when I get a voice out of the blue ~ I must remember to listen! I felt confused by my fascination for this tree. What part of my response could I trust; with its dark twisted bark and huge thorns with shiny blue berries and deep glossy green leaves. I felt a feeling of being held through connecting with it's sturdiness, resilience and tenacity. Were the berries ripe to eat? Would I need to cook them? I needed to be respectful in my approach. If this tree was person it would be like an old man with short temper when his words were not listened to carefully. With many wonderful stories while sitting smoking his pipe by the fire-side his pockets bulging with old stories of mysterious paths and wonders hidden amongst rock, bone and wood. His old eyes sparkling in the dim light full of life and vibrancy. His stick hard as rock ready to beat back any scurrilous stranger. As his smoke created strange shapes around his face his laughter cracked inside the fire stirring the embers. He could be seen simultaneously sitting at the fire that was slow burning while at the same time sitting on the cliffs edge watching the sun rise and fall. Easily overlooked and misunderstood by many who are in too much haste and impatience.

Blackthorn is the brother tree to its sister Hawthorn. Feared because of it's nature. It's magical medicine can be seen through observing it's apparence and it's medicinal properties.

Blackthorn the first to flower before other trees and whose berries are last to ripen in Autumn. The thorns if you are cut by them can become septic. The wood is extremely hardy. Blackthorn has many medicinal properties and which include boosting the immune system as well as being a cleanser/purifier. Sloe berries are very tonic bitters. They are astringent, and stimulate the metabolism, clean the blood, and are used as a laxative and diuretic. They help with indigestion, eczema, herpes, allergies, colds, catarrh, neurosis, weak heart, kidney stones, skin, bladder, and prostrate problems. They disperse toxins.10 In 17th and 18th Century, sloes were brewed as a purgative to treat “fluxes in the belly.”(The Spirit of Trees, page 187)“The fruit and leaves of Blackthorn contain tannins, organic acids, sugars and vitamin C. Steeped in boiling water, the flowers have a mild diuretic, tonic and laxative properties. The dried fruits are used to treat bladder, kidney and stomach disorders. The liquid from the boiled leaves can be used as a mouthwash for sore throat, tonsillitis and laryngitis. It is also good for circulations, blood strengthening, and nutrient absorption.” (The Wisdom of Trees, page 127)

Green Man Tree Essences: “Blackthorn - Circulation. Helps absorption of energies necessary for life. Stabilizes emotions. Brings hope and joy. Stimulating.”

“The leaves can be boiled into a decoction that, once cooled, is an excellent mouthwash and gargle for those suffering from tonsillitis or laryngitis. It can also be used as a soothing eye bath. A tea made from the powdered bark has a calming effect on the nerves.” (Celtic Tree Mysteries, page 166)

"Blackthorn is a guardian, keeper of the shadows, holder of the darkest secrets." "Helps us to bring light where there is darkness." (Tree Angel Oracle, p56)

Sources for Magical, Health and Healing Properties found in:

http://www.druidry.org/

Tree Wisdom by Jacquellne Memory Paterson

Tree Angel Oracle by Fred Hageneder & Anne Heng

Boscastle ~ Witchcraft Museum

2011-09-04T10:22:00.002+01:00

Boscastle ~ Coast

2011-09-04T09:55:00.012+01:00

Aubery Buxton Nature Reserve ~ Wing

2011-08-30T19:52:00.003+01:00

ALTAI

2011-08-25T12:02:00.010+01:00

Photo of Altai Mountian Range: http://www.aquerius.co.uk/altai/

Sometimes it takes a few nudges from Spirit for the message to get through. A few weeks ago a woman lent me a book and said to me Spirit had told her that I needed to read this. I thanked her and placed it on my pile of books to read. Promtly forgetting it. Then last week another handed me this book and said that if I had not read it I should and gave me it to me. I took it home then realizing it was the same book. Following is a review from Reed Business Information, Inc. Product Description:

“When the young Russian psychiatrist Olga Kharitidi set out on an impetuous journey into the snowbound Altai Mountains of Siberia, she never dreamed that her experience there would shatter and rebuild her view of reality. Among the wintry villages and pine forests of Siberia, guided by mysterious native sages, Kharitidi unearthed the wellspring of the worlds mystical traditions, discovered deep secrets of healing and magic, and encountered revolutionary teachings about the true nature of the human soul. Entering the Circle shares her thrilling adventure–and her stunning discoveries–with the world. As a dedicated young psychiatrist at an austere state hospital in the former Soviet Union, Olga Kharitidi battled the difficulties of Soviet life and the constraints of medical science in her fight to save her suffering patients. Joining an ailing friend on a spur-of-the-moment trip into Siberia’s Altai Mountains, Kharitidi was launched on an unexpected journey of revelation when she was taken into apprenticeship by an enigmatic native shaman. The wild adventure that followed would forever change Kharitidi’s view of healing, science, consciousness–and the potential of the human soul itself. Entering the Circle shares Kharitidi’s remarkable true story and the revelatory teachings she received during her sojourn with mysterious sages of Siberia. Guided through bizarre, magical, and often terrifying experiences by her shaman-teacher Umai–and by a radical Soviet physicist whose studies challenged the very nature of reality–Kharitidi unlocked a storehouse of spiritual learning that had lain hidden in inaccessible Siberia for centuries. Deep in Siberia, Kharitidi’s path of knowledge led her ever closer to unlocking the secrets of Belovodia, also known as Shambala, a fabled civilization of highly evolved humans who have for eons spread their sacred knowledge through the world’s great faiths, including Buddhism, Christian mysticism, Sufism, and Vedic Hinduism. She learned, through firsthand experience, that waking reality–the fabric of our daily lives–is only the near shore of our Spirit Lake, the sea of…..(?)”

The name of the book is ~ "Entering the Circle - Ancient Secrets of Siberian Wisdom Discovered by a Russian Psychiatrist" by Olga Kharitidi. Olga Kharitidi makes reference to a frozen mummy discovered in 1993. Apparently 1 of aprox 700 other tombs in the area.

‎"In 1993 a frozen mummy nicknamed 'The Ice Maiden' was discovered in the Altai Mountains in Siberia (see image). The unique preservation of this tattooed mummy and the warming Altai climate prompted Russian archaeologists to transport her... to the Siberian capital of Novosibirsk for scientific study. The removal resulted in political unrest in the local shaman community, located in the Kosh-Agach region, who demanded that the mummy be reinterred. However, reluctant to leave the mummy to deteriorate, the scientists refused to return it to its thawing grave. After 16 years of debate, a petition with almost 5,000 signatures and a decision by the central government in Moscow, the plan is to return the mummy to a purpose-built exhibit in the museum at Gorno-Altaisk in the Altai region3."
http://www.nature.com/ngeo/journal/v4/n1/full/ngeo1043.html

'The Ice Maiden' has designs tatooed over her body which the book has illustrated at the start of each chapter. Olga Kharitidi's book refers to humans awaking to our consciousness. I find it extraordinary that this is occuring alongside the discovery of these tombs. I am reminded of the talk I went to by the Shaman Angaangaq Angakkorsuaq from Greenland who spoke of the plight of the northern lands ice melt which is linked to the Western Man's heart being frozen. The Western Man/Ego has frozen those links to ancient Wisdom/Spirit. And we think that the more we dig the more we x-ray examin and expose the more answers we find. In fact we risk loosing further discoveries and mystery. If we dismantle an intricate clock and examin all it's pieces. Will we understand the craftmanship? Will know how to piece the clock back? Will we understand time?

Awaken to Life

2011-08-21T16:01:00.048+01:00

“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait." Paulo Coelho Facebook
***

“Why has our society morphed into a society of addicts? You may balk at that question, thinking, “I’m not an addict,” but if that is your response, then you need to redefine your understanding of what qualifies as an addiction. In addition to substances, addictions include attitudes and actions. Addictions are, in effect, a choice to remain unconscious in an age rapidly moving toward a new paradigm of consciousness.
So, what makes us naturally inclined toward addictions? Whether alcohol, drugs, sex, technology, Internet communication/emails, gossiping, power, cruelty, exercise, or food, the fact is we are by nature addicts. We are always seeking some way, some method, some means through which we can escape our ordinary state of consciousness, if only for thirty minutes of distraction or a temporary physical buzz brought on by a glass of wine or a candy bar no one sees us eat, or drugs that make us feel good. We can’t stop ourselves – and that is a fact.
Addiction is a stage of consciousness that every single human being progresses through"
Caroline Myss http://myss.com/news/archive/2011/081711.htm

***
“Whether we realize it or not, we are all dreaming the world into being. What we're engaging in is not the sleeping act we're so familiar with, but rather a type of dreaming we do with our eyes open. When we're unaware that we share the power to co-create reality with the universe itself, that power slips away from us, causing our dream to become a nightmare. We begin to feel we're the victims of an unknown and frightening creation that we're unable to influence, and events seem to control and trap us. That only way to end this dreadful reality is to awaken to the fact that it too is a dream - and then recognize our ability to write a better story, one that the universe will work with us to manifest" Alberto Villoldo

***
"In The Conference of the Birds, Persian poet Farid Din Attar wrote this about suffering:

If crazy dervishes behave like this
It’s not for you to take their words amiss;
If they seem drunk to you, control your scorn–
Their lives are painful, savage, and forlorn;
They must endure a lifetime’s hopelessness
And every moment brings some new distress–
Don’t meddle with their conduct, don’t reprove
Those given up to madness and to love.
You would excuse them–nothing is more sure–
If you could share the darkness they endure.

Those of us who work at spiritual and psychological growth will encounter great darkness along the way. It is no coincidence that one of the first archetypes one meets in the individuation process is the Shadow Archetype. All that we’d hidden from ourselves, all that we shove down and away, all that we project on others and hate in them–that’s what we find in the darkness. It can be overwhelming. A person in the phase of personal work can become overwhelmed and lose heart, just as a person encountering grief, sorrow, stress, and other dark experiences can lose heart without hope or encouragement.
Hope is knowing that the moon will return, and even its most feeble light will illuminate the world. "
From the Darkness ~ The Third Eve Blog ~ https://eve3.wordpress.com/
***
"Authentic relationship with darkness and unknowing usually brings about a shamanic death (the alchemical nigredo). It is not for the faint~ hearted, and it's way beyond the ego's fantasies, attachments, or ideas of grandeur. It includes experiences of 'hell', as well as 'heaven', as we attempt to find optimal relationship with the flame. Jung found that a victory for the Self always included a defeat for the ego, an experience we are sure to have is seeking alchemical renewal." Monika Wikman ~ Pregnant Darkness.

***
There would have been a further inclusion to this post from Carolyn Myss talk on Spiritual Madness if I could summarise her talk which of course I can not! She spoke of the challenging times we are living in which the Mystical path that was once for the few ~ who separated themselves from ordinary way of life ~ has now evolved to being experienced by the many who do not separate themselves from ordinary living. We are evolving fast. Carolyn Myss speaks of the necessity for the Dark Night of the Soul as we strive to integrate a strong psychological Self with the Spiritual Oneness; which is about letting go of the individualism and ego materialistic drivers. She suggests that in today's Western Society Spiritualism has even become a commodity. Where the idea of reaching our Spiritual enlightenment can be dictated by our egos. We bargain with God expecting rewards on our terms, for our efforts.

Carolyn Myss highlights how much of a challenge it is to be on the mystical path while bringing up families and working to earn a living, instead of living in an ashram or retreat. For, when we ask the Divine to speak to us we invite Chaos. We ask for those props/addictions we use to escape from our Soul and Life, to be rattled. We then find those systems of thought and habit no longer work. So we look outside and where are our answers? We must look inside; into the darkness and the unknown for 'The light at the end of the tunnel'. However, there is one myth that needs to be dismissed. There is not just the one Dark Night of the Soul that we must journey.

When I listened to her talk I reflected on how this mystical experience is not just being experienced by individuals on their own but due to living life with others; their journeys are being felt by those around them. The affect is rippling inwardly and outwardly. Those of us on spiritual paths are coming together to validate, learn remember and connect. I am experiencing how we are re-learning to share this journey with ourselves and each other. Integral to this is not just remembering a spiritual language but creating a new way of experience and co-creating. This co-creating is deeply healing. Is becoming and being more conscious and alive. Speaking from our Soul. Soul Speak.

The above quotes I have chosen as they speak to me at this point of my journey at a time where I am questioning how, why, and/or when I speak. There are times images and/or sound can fulfil experience more than words. Though we/many may speak the same language, at the same time and place in history. We can be deceived into thinking that we understand ourselves and each other fully, not just from a mind space but also body and soul. I think one of my primary senses is visual and as such I believe I speak words from a primary visual space, which might differ from another who functions more from another sense or more from a mind space.

When the Soul speaks it is in deeper language that though rarer is accessible; and if one has the courage to release control ~ can fully experience. Poetry for me can be a medium that though is of word, is magical because it is many bridges between the Mind~Body~Soul between the unconscious and conscious. It has been described as food for the Soul. It creeps/crawls/walks/runs/skips on the edge. It does not just speak or even shout ~ it Sings.

At such times when a person is in transition. Between stations unsure of the destination, country or landscape. I speak both in the physical and metaphysical. Soul Speak not only describes but also co-creates. Soul is a tear drop from Spirit. Our journey/the track we are on is not just a to b. Many of us are aware of this when we experience Déjà vu; an opening in our consciousness of an awareness that we have been here before. This is different to that of premonition which predicts the future. Déjà vu is a meeting of time and worlds at that moment.

The journey of the Soul is not a clear staged journey from Earth below to Heaven above. To be followed by a guide book as we tread well-worn steps up the mountain with clearly marked stages and stations, with refreshments and signed lovely views. The journey of the Soul asks us to fully awaken to Life. To dance with muddied feet so dead skin is peeled away to reveal tender bark. True Soul is experienced through a greening of nature, a returning to Source. The Well of Life that lies behind dark walls of the hidden garden. There is a door to this garden but the Key. The Key is our Heart.

Along the way there are guides. Some share riddles. Some will lead us into traps. Some will share gifts to aid us along our way. All are Spirit sent. Even the devils. As the saying goes "Our worst teachers are our best teachers". There is another way to walk other than the even bland world, with muted dulled senses where we inhabit the Masks of Safety. Behind which our demons cry out, even though they kept saying yes this is the right way! You will be OK.

Not fully Awakened to Life. We travel a smooth road that is never dark. So eager to have our way shown. Lightened up. Safe. We wipe out the Stars our birth place. Not fully open to mystery. A life shallow limited to surprises. We dare not swim in waters that are deep, afraid of beings we can't quite make out let alone understand. I would therefore ask people to put away their mobile tracking phone maps, when walking in the countryside. Don't do it! Take a paper map if you must. Allow your inner Divine child to discover and adventure. Trust. Drink in that wonder, joy and delight. Be intoxicated but not drunk and not addicted; but fully Awakened to Life. Laugh with gurgling wonder and hiccup.
***

Cardiomorpheos

2011-08-21T13:53:00.005+01:00

Francisci Ponae ~ Cardiomorpheos ~ 1645

http://www.archive.org/stream/francisciponaeca00pona#page/n3/mode/2up

http://openlibrary.org/about

2011-08-19T11:04:00.009+01:00

His body iron me cold ~ skin to wall
swollowing his cigarette ash whisky gin

above his engine noise ~ city seagull calling the sea
I remember I once had wings

and then I fly
my heart broken open

blood on the floor
salt tears for this earth

2011-08-18T16:24:00.003+01:00

in deep earthern black heart
purr sweet note in the silence

23x33 Charocal

2011-08-13T13:09:00.002+01:00

My Body is a Cage ~ Arcade Fire/ Peter Gabriel

2011-08-10T01:22:00.004+01:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MeFezGJF7mA&feature=related

Somerset ~ Glastonbury & Compton Dundon

2011-08-09T21:44:00.003+01:00

Loving the Two Halves

2011-08-03T19:16:00.003+01:00

Usually, without growth being forced on us, few of us go willingly on
the spiritual journey. Why would we? The rug has to be pulled out from
beneath our game, so we redefine what balance really is. We eventually
get a feel for true balance when we fall and rise a number of times.

More than anything else, this falling/rising cycle is what moves us into
the second half of our own lives. All falling, no growth! Always on top,
no growth! There is a "necessary suffering" to human life, and if we
avoid its cycles we remain immature forever. It can take the form of
failed relationships, facing our own shadow self, conflicts and
contradictions, disappointments, moral lapses, depression in any number
of forms. All of these have the potential to edge us forward in life, or
dig in our heels even deeper, producing narcissistic and adolescent
responses that everybody can see except ourselves. We either "fall
upward," or we just keep falling.
(Fr. Richard - Loving the two halves of life)

***

Peter Gabriel ~ Downside Up
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o2TZyYkohxk

I looked up at the tallest building
Felt it falling down
I could feel my balance shifting
Everything was moving around
These streets so fixed and solid
A shimmering haze
And everything that I relied on disappeared

Downside up, upside down
Take my weight from the ground
Falling deep in the sky
Slipping into the unknown
All the strangers look like family
All the family looks so strange
The only constant I am sure of
Is this accelerating rate of change

Downside up, upside down
Take my weight off the ground
Falling deep in the sky
Slipping into the unknown

I stand here
Watch you spinning
Until I am drawn in
A centripetal force
You pull me in

Pull me in
Pull me in
Pull me in
Pull me in
Pull me in

ovo ovo ovo
ovo ovo ovo
ovo ovo ovo

ovo ovo ovo
ovo ovo ovo
ovo ovo ovo

Downside up
Upside down
Take my weight off the ground
Falling deep in the sky
Slipping into the unknown
***

Make Tomorrow ~ Peter Gabriel. OVO.

2011-08-01T22:55:00.007+01:00

"....Look at tomorrow today.
Make tomorrow today.
When it seems hopeless.
Make tomorrow today.
Where the sacred meet the scared.
Where the dreamers dream is dared.
In each one of us.
A dream can burn like the sun.
Lets try it all one more time.
To get this lesson learnt.
Make tomorrow today..."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdA_V_HYdCI&NR=1

Tender and Beautiful Heart

2011-07-11T21:39:00.022+01:00

Remember you are Magical. You are Unique.

I am searching for a way to commit to living life. Being alive.
I have the luxury to be able to say this. As I am not struggling to survive.
I want to have the expansive heart to appreciate this life. As Chogyam Trungpa describes; a raw, tender and beautiful heart.
Is it possible not to question every moment as if waiting for an answer, that is either an apology or an enraged rejection. I believe it is.
Can I bare not to question the struggle. Cherish the challenges in life that carve out this twisted shape, hiding secret chambers, each one sounding a unique note.
And so in my job I use the word 'resilance' to parents of children who want more and more and more, of what they are not sure.
Tonight I watched a dramatization of the life and work of Vincent Van Gogh taken from his letters to his brother. It seems to me that he struggled his whole life to feel a deep connection. A validation that made sense of his world. Where his aliveness was not rejected. Where he belonged.
I yearn for a continuity. I yearn for community - as did Vincent. And when community is forgotten I find myself lost within a crowd. And so I treasure my own space where I cut myself off. Running away. Far away from everyone else. From myself.
As I reflect on life being change. Each moment passing. The one life line is Spirit; that pulses in our bloodlines.
When we all die from this life our voices shape the music that creates the vessel this earth. Without this continuity it seems to me that the desolute isolation that Vincent felt, can only increase as we see our disconnection externalized in the loss of our environment.
As more of our wilderness disappears more of our senses dull. And so we rage on and the fires spread deep in the earth, stripping our woodlands bare. We are lost. Paths dissapearing. The earth melting our shoes. Peeling our ashen skin back, to smiling bare shining white bone.
Our nostrils full of smoke. In our desperation to touch earth. Unable to breathe. Unable to sing. We limit our capacity to live. We limit our capacity for empathy.
If there is a Devil this is it. Hopelessness. Addiction. Seperation. Violence. This Devil a shadow puppet hiding a face full of tears. An ocean of tears, where upon floats so many ships, full of lost souls.
Dare we look upon this our Devil?
Rather than being overwhelmed is it possible to deeply feel?
Sensuality. Celebration of life. To be fully awake deeply sense the world.
As a child the breeze brushes against soft bare skin, feeling each tiny hair vibrate. Feeling the tempeture rise or fall. Catching smells diverse, rich, dark, light, delicate, raw. Beautiful. Creating space. Connecting time. Connecting memory.

"There is unlimited sound, unlimited sight, unlimited taste, unlimited feeling and so on. The realm of perception is limitless, so limitless that perception itself is primordial, unthinkable, beyond thought."

So this being fully alive is a lack of seperation. And with this I imagine comes a deep awareness of responsibilty. A deep love. Beyond conflict - 'Drala'

"One of the key points in discovering drala principle is realizing that your own wisdom as a human being is not seperate from the power of things as they are. They are both reflections of the unconditioned wisdom of the cosmic mirror. Therefore there is no fundamental seperation or duality between you and your world."

Shambala - The Sacred Path of the Warrior by Chogyam Trungpa.

2011-06-15T20:17:00.002+01:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=POomCHT6hNE&NR=1

The Dream of the Earth. Chapter 3. Thomas Berry

2011-06-15T19:32:00.000+01:00

Merlin by Alan Lee

Passion

2011-05-17T22:59:00.036+01:00

Terrible Beauty

Cadair Idris or as I have named the Belly~eye of the Goddess.
The place where myth says if you stay over night, you will either become mad or a poet. I was honored to have journeyed there. As I climbed, accompanied by many, women and men, young and old. The higher I climed the further I travelled back in time. Forest bracken tall moss dripping onto Faery Hawthorn made way to, gold burning sun guarded by deep red blood berried Rowan's. As I bathed my hot feet in the sharp clear lake, an increasing buzzing filled the air. Until all was silent. Everyone driven from the lake. The mountain stripped. Not until standing naked foot bare, did my swollen flying ant bites diminish their heat. My blood an offering. I needed to touch flesh skin bone with stone. On my return I was saw no one. Dreaming of lion roar from Star to sand. Not sure what was human. Not sure where when I had been born.

***
"Last night I went to sleep as a child and only to wake up this morning to find I was a man. In my hands I discovered the tools on the way to my father, and in my heart I found the loves and fears of my mother. Confrontation between the night and the day. The land and the sea. The fire and the air. The Sacred and the profane. The holy and the unholy. The focused and the misdirected. The bullet and the flesh. The Mind and the Spirit. The sound when you hear it. The oppressor and the resistor. The brother and the sister. We are now walking the ghosts of the dead. We are alive with the Spirit of our Passion" ~ Michael Franti Passion { 1 Giant Leap 2002}

Is it possible to truly understand in a deep knowing ~ Love or Peace without the comparison of the opposite of Violence and Fear? Is that comparison really like light vs dark? And if God/dess is all that is and all that is, is Divine. What then?

Is violence not separation ~ alienation? Evil the devil chained to pain and suffering. That which makes the lie so convincing. Numbing the heart. Dulling the senses. Addiction. So is not evil separation from union with the Other ~ The Beloved ~ Divine ~ Alive.

Maybe Life and Death are not separate. But interlinked. Maybe this is the learning to remember and return from that which was separated. Realize the false allure of the fools gold and return to the Divine infinite, and ignite that spark become the flame. Remembering our nature as primeval forest, where what could be viewed as a dead branch, is vibrant with life and regeneration. Trees standing tall, green life full, dissolves melting into soil. Touch taste, smell the air with our snake tongue. Belly flat to earth. Winged Serpents we fly. Spirit made Flesh.

" ...We are now walking with the ghosts of the dead. We are alive with the Spirit of our Passion..."

When I hear scientists speak of the expanding universe reaching a point where there is nothing. A completion. I wonder whether such scientists have forgotten ~ that which is being perceived is altered by the act of perception. The creative act. All that exists depending on being experienced. Witnessed. Maybe then it is not about completion or conclusion. The ending is the beginning. A Full circle. Co-Creators Creating this World.

A child's soft hand cradling the old

Can we dream and be fully awake? Beyond delusion. Not only dip our toes in the lake but swim pumping heart dive, cry into that terrifying ice. Awesome, powerful, terrible raw, Primal beauty. Into our own Divine reflection And in doing so touch the Stars?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSW825HqtS8

2011-05-14T12:51:00.001+01:00

Insight enables you to know your own heart and clarity enables you to accept without illusion ~ Deepak Chopra

Cornwall 6th-11th May

2011-05-14T08:42:00.019+01:00

St Michaels Mount

St Micheals Chapel

Parallel Community Gardens

Lamorna

Merry Maidens Stone Circle

2011-05-02T23:57:00.000+01:00

"I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that." ~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr

2011-05-02T13:58:00.006+01:00

Bus home
My head bobbing on surface of sleep
I awake Laughing firefly
Light tiny hairs on his ears

Appreciating Gifts Unexpected

2011-04-25T08:16:00.017+01:00

Ashdown Forest

Kew Gardens

With the sunny weather and days off from work I have been able to take the opportunity to go out and be in 'The Nature' as the Swede's say. On Thursday I decided to go for a mini adventure and explore somewhere near that I didn't know. Ashdown Forest. Hoping for bluebells ~ tantalizing just out of touch at the beginning of the trail was a cut off woodland with sea of violet blue. I went on expecting trees green and hoping for blue bells at Ashdown Forest. Instead, I got heathland with panoramic views and honey smelling golden gorse with orange tipped white butterflies and the distant call of cuckoos.

I also met a young man at pooh bridge who had neatly dismantled a computer game each part laid out neatly across the bridge. He proceeded to ask me why I was wearing a dress and trousers. I didn't know how to respond other than I frequently did so. "Weird" was his response and proceeded to show me how his swing across the river worked with the unfortunate side effect of being like a "cheese cutter". An interesting 'modern day' guardian me thought. After getting lost after the bridge I ended my walk with 4 whopping blisters from my trusted Birkenstocks who have never failed me before.

I was curious to experience early on in my walk, not just the once but twice, people more local to the area lost asking me directions. Which I was able to do from my scanty guide book. Later on when I got lost I had mis-interpreted the guide book ~ which was written word not visual map. I had not gone with my instincts which were right.

Two days later somewhat hobbling, I went to Kew Gardens in search of bluebells up close. And bluebells I found in such abundance. So I feel even the blisters are gifts encouraging me to keep reaching outside of my comfort zone, to experience and explore more.

So, what do I do with my old shoes no longer fit for purpose? Can't recycle them yet as I am not ready to walk bare foot in the city. Next time shall I risk not taking a map? My blisters transient, my memories clear and lasting.

***

Kew

2011-04-14T10:59:00.024+01:00

Waiting for the sun to shine with the largest audience he opened up. Cameras flashing lens zooming. A cacophony of screams, screeches, shouts. Children skip run finger tip his feathers. He circles. Wind bellowing his sail. Stills the air before shaking his feathers, rippling eyes flashing fires of stars. Rattle snake whispering stroke of thunder. You are beautiful I say out loud again and again and again...

2011-03-21T20:47:00.023Z

Robert Sadler installation

I get that I am here to learn. But am I asking the 'right' questions.
?
When expectations fail is it time for change.
Will I know that I have learnt what I need and must move on.
For it might not make sense now. And if so ~ so what.
If Learning is not about answers what then.
Left between knowing and not knowing.
A Question mark
Sounds suspiciously like the Sacred Fool making mischief.
Dancing in the chaos.
Talking in tongues.
Singing in riddles.
Maybe I can just accept that I don't know.
Integral to learning is making mistakes.
A mistake is part of discovery of the unknown.
Part of the creative act.
?
At the same time acceptance is taking responsibility.
Not walking away or giving up.
Opening up to possibility.
Opening up to empowerment.
?
All possibilities are in the moment.
Each moment is eternal.
We are all co creators and Creation is continuous.
Like the Sacred Fool I can find the question mark which is the divine laugh.

?
Where does that laugh originate.
Is it in the sex the desire to connect and create.
Is it in the belly that 'gut' instinct feeling.
Is it in the solar plexus the centre of sensuality.
Is it in the heart that yearning that comes with the beat.
Is it in the lungs, throat and mouth the breath to name shape with sound and word.
Is it the eyes searching seeking to drink in all that is.
Is it in the head a mirror to reflect in and upon
Is it in fact all that is.

2011-03-17T21:09:00.000Z

"The moment you come to trust chaos, you see God clearly. Chaos is divine order, versus human order. Change is divine order, versus human order. When the chaos becomes safety to you, then you know you're seeing God clearly."

Caroline Myss, "Spiritual Madness: The Necessity of Meeting God in Darkness"

Fifth Sun ~ Fifth Element

2011-03-13T09:37:00.001Z

What Carlos Barrios and the Mayan Elders are Saying About 2012

“We are no longer in the World of the Fourth Sun, but we are not yet in the World of the Fifth Sun. This is the time in-between, the time of transition. As we pass through transition there is a colossal, global convergence of environmental destruction, social chaos, war, and ongoing Earth Changes.”
He continues: “Humanity will continue, but in a different way. Material structures will change. From this we will have the opportunity to be more human. We are living in the most important era of the Mayan calendars and prophecies. All the prophecies of the world, all the traditions are converging now. There is no time for games. The spiritual ideal of this era is action.”
“The economy now is a fiction. The first five-year stretch of transition from August 1987 to August 1992 was the beginning of the destruction of the material world. We have progressed ten years deeper into the transition phase by now, and many of the so-called sources of financial stability are in fact hollow. The banks are weak. This is a delicate moment for them. They could crash globally, if we don’t pay attention. Now, people are paying attention.”
“The element of the Fifth Sun is celestial. Within the context of Ether there can be a joining of the polarities. No more darkness or light in the people, but an uplifted unity. But right now the realm of darkness is not interested in this. They are organized to block it. They seek to unbalance the Earth and its environment so we will be unready for the alignment in 2012.”
“We need to work together for peace, and balance with the other side. We need to take care of the Earth that feeds and shelters us. We need to put our entire mind and heart into pursuing unity and unity now, to confront the other side and preserve life.”
“We are disturbed — we can’t play anymore. Our planet can be renewed or ravaged. Now is the time to awaken and take action. Everyone is needed. You are not here for no reason. Everyone who is here now has an important purpose. This is a hard but a special time. We have the opportunity for growth, but we must be ready for this moment in history.”

2011-03-04T22:50:00.002Z

Photo by Riccardo Savi

2011-03-02T15:04:00.000Z

"The strongest love is love that can demonstrate its fragility." Paulo Coelho

Peace Warrior, Sacred Fool, Wounded Healer

2011-03-01T13:41:00.010Z

In the past I have labelled myself as not having the capacity to communicate or understand due to being dyslexic. In doing so I deprived myself of the power to speak. For years I limited my vocabulary for fear of mispelling. For fear of being misunderstood or being laughed at. For it is common for those with dyslexia to mix up/exchange similar sounding words. However, I have more recently realized the upside of this blurring, created meanings which I hadn't expected! I then realized that this is a great tool for learning and being creative. So coming from this place of seeing words as an organic evolving process I have been asking ~ Can a Warrior be Peaceful? Can a Fool be Sacred. Can a Healer have wounds?

A friend of mine flagged up this wonderful resource: http://citizensoulpower.com/ following an enquiry we have been having the phrase Peaceful Warrior came up. So I went to the page Spirit Warrior where upon there was a list of all the individuals who made such a difference. People like Gandhi, Martin Luther King. I found myself thinking how an individual has the power to do and make so much positive difference. And I was aware how often I have put people up on pedestals so as to limit my own power and potential. I have said to myself there was something unique about them. They were born special. Or like E.Tolle and others like him awoke to awareness in a flash. What they did was extra-ordinary. They are unique individuals. Not 'like the rest of us'.

However I was also reminded of the occasions that I have dared to step out of my own comfort zone, and respond or act beyond what I or others expected. This has created wonderful experiences and occurrences. Sometimes in ways that I could not have imagined. And sometimes this has come from me daring to do something in advance, and other times has happened in the moment. But at all times I was daring to be open to possibility. Daring to be open. To be alive.

For instance I have on many occasions stepped outside of my front door with the intent to smile at people I do not know. I have not only watched at how often people smile back. But I also watch how often I can dare not to care whether this smile is given back. So it is more about giving than receiving. I was daring to see people not as strangers but as people who are like me. I also noticed that in daring to step out of my comfort zone ~ I was daring myself to seem different in my own eyes or others. Daring to be seem silly or foolish. I was inviting the Sacred Fool. Who is in fact courageous.

So for me being a Peaceful Warriors has strong links with the archetype of the Sacred Fool. The Fool who can speak the unspeakable. Who reveals hidden truths. Hidden Treasure. Who reveals wisdom through laughter and joy. The Fool who dares to be different. Dances on the edge. Dances in chaos and creativity. As in the Tarot Card the Fool dares to listen to the dog that nips at his heals and leaps off the edge.

In the Shambhala Buddhist tradition Warrior is referred to as daring to be fully awake. Daring to be open and vulnerable. Connected to our heart. Being authentic is one of the first steps of this process.

As I experience time speeding up. Synchronises abounding. 2012 galloping nearer. With the escalation of world events mirroring the growing awareness for change. I understand this evolutionary shift is an internal and external process. It is circular. We are at a turning point for ourselves and our planet where we need to embrace change. With change comes the possibility for fear; because it is the unknown. But with change also comes the potential for growth, expansion, creativity, healing. All of which gives an opportunity to be in the moment now. And not to wait for another/others to live dreams hopes and aspirations for us. Waiting for the 'perfect time' to be 'more sorted' 'more healed' 'less tired'. In fact all those stories are ways of remaining small. Fear of being vulnerable and alive in the moment.

So maybe this new evolutionary shift where I am hearing it is time for people to evolve into higher vibrations. Maybe another way of looking at this is through another phrase ~ Wounded Healer. Maybe it's not about hierarchy and who will be more evolved than others? For we are all healers. Maybe it's not about having that flash of light, being healed and then going out and doing what we dreamed. But that the flash of light is taking that leap to discover our true selves. Dare to be awkward, nervous, 'get it wrong'. The Fool can seem childlike. S/he understands that growing pains are part of the process. The Fool has an open heart. Is trusting and joyful. This enables her/him to take that leap of faith. While at the same time Accepting where s/he is.

So dare we leap off the edge into the unknown? Be open hearted, be vulnerable and invite the Sacred Fool. Dare we sit with our wounds and in doing so be healed and be healers? Be Wounded Healers. Be Peace Warriors and dare to comit to life.

For to truly comit to life is to celebrate and care with tender open hearts all life ~ in and through Love. To act from a place of Peace. Out of Love protect life. Be life affirming. Be alive. That is courageous. To Be a Peace Warrior.

We are enough as we are. Through allowing our 'minds to drop down to our hearts anything and everything is possible."

Take that leap! Be Courageous. It's Spring!

2011-03-01T10:22:00.001Z

"People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost"

Dalai Lama

If You Want to be Happy

2011-02-24T14:04:00.007Z

"If you want to be miserable think of yourself. If you want to be happy think of others"

Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche.

*
Shambhala Buddhist Tradition from Tibet.
http://www.shambhala.org/teachings/view.php?id=72
Four Dignities That Bring Confidence in Everyday Lifehttp://www.shambhala.org/teachings/view.php?id=50

2011-02-23T19:06:00.001Z

Be fully awake if you want to dream ~ Paulo Coelho

Be the Change

2011-02-23T11:20:00.042Z

*

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously
give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

a return to love - marianne williamson

I have wanted to understand why there is such acceptance and lack of resistance to what is occurring in our country and around the world.? Even though day by day I am witnessing many who are complaining about the cuts there appears to be an overriding drive not to move beyond the status quo. To look at what created the system and not to just blame the bankers. And in doing so to question the system itself and look at how we as individuals and societies continue to support such a dysfunctional system.

Those with a more spiritual focus have described this system as a game or an illusion or greed. While those from political focus describe this system as capitalism. And those from a psychotherapy focus describe this system as a drama, addiction, or co-dependency. Many from different disciplines describe this as individualism and materialism. Many agree that this system is destroying our planet and killing many lives both human and non human. Many agree that this system if unchecked will devour itself and exhaust the world's resources. I would say this system is an act of violence.

I have been wanting to understand what I experience as numbing to dreams and hopes for a better healthy world. A world where the focus is on creativity, growth, potential and the best outcomes. Where people dare to dream of internal and external freedom. Not one that is resigned to choosing second best. That focuses on the worst outcomes so as not to be disappointed. One which shrinks people down, controls and limits. These acts are violent.

For years I have searched for meaning to understand what perpetuates the cycle of fear and violence that I see in myself and in others. I have dabbled in anthropology, philosophy, politics, feminism, environmentalism and spirituality. I've read many books, met many people, attended various groups, meetings, workshops and trainings. Through my searching, researching, exploring, experiencing and sharing I have come to value the teachings in all these disciplines. And I have met others who also draw on different disciplines so they can act like pieces of a jigsaw.

While I was focusing on my own healing this led me to connecting with like minded souls. For a long period I felt I had found a home within the Reclaiming Community whose aim I understood was to connect many of these jigsaw pieces. This was a place where I could experientially connect these different disciplines with an aim of creating a fulfilling alternative way of living. A place where theory could be tested; a grand experiment!

I took a step away from being actively involved with the Reclaiming Community and I withdrew from my outward search and embarked on a relationship which drew me into re-enacting a generational cycle. My mind had thought I had 'sorted' myself through reading psychotherapy, self-help books, many years of analysis and my involvement in groups and workshops. However I was yet to gain a further deeper understanding at a level which included my body and unconscious. Which allowed space for my soul to explore it's voice and begin to sing.

It was in the relationship that my Soul felt increasingly trapped and caged. My first step was to leave. Then when when I was at a safe distance I was able to embark on a deeper understanding. I began to realize how this negative cycle fed on fear through control. Control was an ever decreasing cage that trapped and squashed me. And the ultimate manifestation of this cycle was violence. I began to listen to myself and understand that my anxiety was a natural response to an unhealthy environment. I started to stop being victim to my emotional state which was being used to re-enforce my lack of self-confidence and self-worth. I had started to thaw my heart and feel my souls natural desire for enjoyment of life. And it is from that space that I was able to explore being with others. Connecting more with and in life. It this space that enabled me to see how the personal is linked with the public.

How we live in our personal lives affects how we live in our public lives. Our capacity/tolerance for personal freedoms affects our capacity/tolerance of public freedoms. Both are interlinked. If the majority of society are struggling to survive; using up all their energy on tiring low paid jobs which only the few are lucky to have or, dysfunctional relationships. Then they are more easily controlled. It works both ways. For our families are also a reflection of our society. Another way of looking at this pattern is noticying how the outside world reflects our inner world. For instance isn't uncanny that when feeling happy with yourself and the world the world smiles back? Literally! But if you are feeling isolated, impatient or angry, then the world mirrors this back through situations and people putting up obstacles.

The cages we place ourselves in are cages around our hearts. And these cages come lined with deluxe furnishings. With the trappings of gold and plasma TVs pumping out 'reality tv shows' or shows on 'make overs' to create perfect human beings with perfect homes. We are fed and feed images to compare ourselves with thus creating envy. We want to live the impossible dream.So we keep our cages comfortable, full of desirable material things to keep ourselves occupied. An illusion of security. These cages fed by addiction is what Capatilism thrives and relies on. Hence the frequent remark in response to percieved negative feelings, overwhelming emotions or situations ~ 'I am off for a bit of shopping therapy' or 'I could murder for a pint'. Until we look at the drivers behind addiction, we will not stop the bankers earning huge bonuses or people craving more and more money through credit. And society will not own up to the fact that alcohol is a drug which is the cause of so much violence. Because the terrible truth is that so many in society are addicted to violence. So many in society are not aware what is violent.

In "Freedom for Sale ~ How we made money and lost our liberty" John Kampfner refers to private and public freedoms which I think has parallels to what I have referred to as personal and public freedom. He divides his book into different countries including Britain. Under Britain: Surveillance State, John Kampfner first quotes Brendan O'Neill " Britain used to export textiles, iron, steel and pop music; now it exports Orwellian methods for monitoring the masses".

"By the time Blair left office in 2007, he had bequeathed to his successor a surveillance state unrivalled anywhere in the democratic world. Parliament passed forty-five criminal justice laws ~ more than the total for the whole of the previous century ~ creating more than three thousand new criminal offences...The scope was extensive: police and security forces were given greater powers of arrest and detention; all institutions of state were granted increased rights to snoop; individuals were required to hand over unprecedented forms of data. Abroad, the government colluded with the transport of terrorist suspects by the US government to secret prisons around the world, giving landing rights at British airports for these so-called "rendition" flights. At home, new crimes were created, such as glorifying terrorism or inciting religious hatred"

So the message is clear. Remain in terror. There is an increasing threat of criminal behaviour. Of terrorism. The cage is just a barrier to keep the dangerous out. Them and Us. And because the enemy is within we have surveillance. Depending on the society and culture cages come in all shapes and sizes. In his book John Kampfner shares his investigations into the different countries of Singapore, China, Russia, United Arab Emirates, India, Italy, Britain and USA. He suggests that there is a world wide pattern. He says:

"The specific rules varied between countries, but the template was similar. Repression was selective, confined to those who openly challenged the status quo. The number of people who fell into that category was actually very few ~ journalists who criticised the state or published information that cast the powerful in a negative light; lawyers who defended these agitators; and politicians and others who publicly went out of their way to "cause trouble". The rest of the population could enjoy freedom to travel, to live more or less as they wished and to make and spend their money. This was the difference between public freedoms and private, or privatised, freedoms. For many people this presented an attractive proposition. After all, how many members of public, going about their daily lives, wish to challenge the structures of power? One can more easily than one realises be lulled into thinking that one is sufficiently free.

This is the pact. In each country it varies; citizens hand over different freedoms in accordance with their own customs and priorities. In some it is press freedom; in some it is the right to vote out their government; in some it is an impartial judiciary; in others it is the ability to get on with their lives without being spied upon. In many it is a combination of these and more.
"In the global order of the past two decades, the alliance of political leaders, business and the middle classes was the key. The arrangement was built on a clear, but usually discreet set of understandings. What mattered in all these societies was that the number of people who benefited from this deal gradually increased, and that the state remained flexible enough to meet their various needs. These needs could be summarised as: property rights, contract law, environmental protection, lifestyle choices, the right to travel, and the right to earn money ~ and keep it. the people who mattered ~ the wealthy and the aspiring wealthy ~ were to be protected against the use of arbitrary state power. But could such protection be provided without the tools of conventional democracy, such as free elections and open media? That was the conundrum that authoritarian capitalists faced"

This book was written prior UK coalition government's right wing radical changes which are sweeping UK under the banner of necessary cuts. And the more recent events in the middle east. The middle east uprisings have created a wave of hope not just in the middle east but across the globe. On the wave has lept British PM David Cameron through publicly travelling middle eastern countries speaking of democracy and freedom at the same time ensuring future investment in arms. Ofcourse he has to utter both in the same breath. And I think what is so disturbing is he believes in what he does and says. The swift timely eager response of his tour for me betrays his anxiety to ensure the continued arms trade; in order to keep the status quo in tact. And of course there is big money to be made. But what would happen if more and more people began to believe that there was not this ever present and increasing threat? That started to question the morality of the arms trade. No longer being 'lulled into believing they were sufficiently free', began to believe in more liberated ways of living? Maybe then revolution might even occur on our own doorsteps here in UK and other countries. This is what unfortunately David Cameron and many others fear. With change comes the potential of fear. But I would also add that with change come the potential for excitement.

In "Peace is the Way, Bringing war and violence to an end" by Deepak Chopra refers to three major components to the ultimate myth of security ~ the ultimate manifestation of violence and control; the arms build up:
Money brings happiness
Technology brings well-being
Military strength brings security

This holy trinity of capitalism is the ultimate cage. The ultimate trap that does not make us safer. Living outside of the cage is safer. I believe that peaceful change is a stronger power. Because it is life affirming. I hear that many in the peaceful uprising in Egypt were inspired by the works of Gene Sharp who speaks of peaceful ways of liberation. It was not as the media have promoted the power of technology such as Internet and mobile phones that was key to the revolution but the message of peace. So when other regimes try to stop peaceful liberation through blocking Internet and mobiles they will in the end fail.

His Holiness the Dalai Lama said; "'If we want to change the world, we have to begin by changing ourselves".

The veil between humans and nature, between private and public, between mind and matter, between thought and action, between being and doing is an illusion. There is a third way which can also be described as multi-disciplinary or holistic. That moves away from a dualistic/conflictual/advisory mind set. Creating an expansive space. Moves away from the rigid and brittle. To the flexible and changeable. Opening up up new possibilities. This is the creative spark which is Divine. That is light and Dark. It is Consciousness. It is Infinite. It is.

As Gandhi said:"Can you be the change that you wish to see in the world?"

So I take courage and inspiration from those who are able to connect with peaceful liberation. Whether that is on a mass scale as in Egypt or on a personal scale. Both are the change that can be seen in the world. And there by changes the world. Which reminds me of the chant that is so often used at Reclaiming gatherings:

"She changes everything she touches and touches everything she changes!" Blessed Be!

***

References:

Britain can push democracy or weapons but not both. By Simon Jenkins. http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2011/feb/22/britain-push-democracy-weapons-cameron

UK arms sales to the Middle east, who do we sell to, how much is military and how much just 'controlled'?.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/news/datablog/2011/feb/22/uk-arms-sales-middle-east-north-africa?intcmp=239

Gene Sharp Web page Albert Einstein Institution
http://www.aeinstein.org/

Freedom for Sale: How we made mondey and lost our liberty. By John Kampfner.

Peace is the Way: Bringing War and violence to an end. By Deepak Chopra.

Reclaiming Web page
http://www.reclaiming.org/

Finding Treasure where you Least Expect

2011-02-20T19:38:00.008Z

I wish in future I can cherish each moment in the moment. In doing so I will be able to fully experience. I will not be living out of regret.

How often when something or someone seems so vibrant so strong they can be suddenly be gone. I can find it hard to believe that all is transient. Not to focus on the Loss but instead focus on all that I have experienced. To celebrate and enjoy.

What set this particular train of feeling and thought in motion, was that my local charity shop has had it's management change hands. And the manager was incredibly significant. He was in the tradition of British Eccentric. Wealthy and with that came an ease of behaving. He was I think a member of another wonderful tradition of artists. Incredible intense. Incredibly creative. And at times deliciously non PC! With a gift of story telling so that in every telling the story became more dramatic. I was never sure of what was 'the reality' which was rather liberating and refreshing!

In his shop all and everyone was welcome and included. I had the experience that it was a place where if people dared they could be what they wished. They could try on a role or costume. On one momentous day I met a Transsexual who literally spent the day trying on women's clothes asking advice from Stephan the Manager, me and Adam Ant who ran into the shop seeking refuge from his nightmares. On that same day I was helping out behind the counter as the young lady who usually helped out, took exception to Adam and walked out. Shortly after a woman came in and ended up getting a psychic reading from Hazel the resident witch; otherwise known as Elizabeth or Silver Fox. Due to having her dog stolen.

That day was like a Reclaiming 7 day WitchCamp intensive ~ compressed into 1 day. And it took me quite sometime to recover from such a high intensity of experience! For Stephan ~ well this was not quite his average day but I imagine not that extraordinary.

He created a community. On entering the shop he would introduce everyone to that person. And whatever name he chose was your name! Over the years the shop got fuller and fuller with more donations, more people and the walls covered with pictures, photos, poems and mementos. And the shop displays were wonderful. People's discarded 'junk' could be transformed into a rich diverse delicious display. It was a treasure trove. It was a place where he was the Grand Master the Warlock as he loved to declare. And the funny thing is, even though I had the sneaking suspicion he thought he wasn't. He was in fact a Mage! Because for me he did transform. He did create a space where so much more was possible. An Alchemist in your local shop. How subversive is that!

I have known him for over 10 years ~ during which he has moved from charity shop to charity shop within this vicinity. This last 5 years he spent at my local charity shop. He gave me so much. And he would say time and time again how much I gave him.

However he moved on without me having a chance to say goodbye or to find out where he is going next. And for me it was a shock. I knew something was up coos the shop had been closed 'for refurbishment' for ages. Today I had a free Saturday and went in. It had been stripped bare. With a rather nervy new manager behind the counter. With only 2 customers. And the walls a bland white with only a few items clearly priced. Not to be enjoyed and/or to be part of creating an experience of sharing and community. Just things to be sold on in an ordinary shop. A place of transience. Of things people have discarded. Not a place for the ordinary to be extraordinary.

For me the timing in which I saw this charity shop ~ now an empty space ~ comes at a time when I am experiencing the UK government speaking of 'Big Society'. While at the same time wanting to sell of forests and get rid of Public Libraries. Wanting to strip away so much richness, so much diversity, so much creativity. Was to say the least sad.

So this is a big thank you to Stephan which I imagine is one of many names. I wish you safe travels, happiness and peace. What you created is in my heart. And because your vision was shared, this can be re-created by many because you shared so much.

Grail

2011-02-13T14:44:00.000Z

Dare to feel. Dare to Care.

2011-02-12T21:54:00.026Z

"Placing the blame or judgment on someone else leaves you powerless to change your experience. Taking responsability for your beliefs and judgments gives you the power to change them" ~ Byron Katie

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5fOvcta3Ws&feature=related ~ Peter Gabriel 'Digging in the Dirt'.

When in discussions on peaceful ways to responding to violence I have found this question is often posed: "What would you do if a person had a gun and was going to threaten to kill someone?". And the people asking this sometimes go on to add ~ "Because you do not want to harm them; would a peaceful response mean just standing by and not intervening? Would you stand by and let them kill others?" Not surprisingly I have found myself struggling to respond.

I have heard a a range of answers. One which I have found very moving is that a peaceful person would stand in front the person with the gun. They would risk their own lives to protect others. Selflessly. That it is the vacancy of fear that breaks the cycle of violence. And on hearing this I have pondered whether I could do such a thing, whether I could act not out of fear. And to be honest my answer has been that I am not confident that I could.

Then I remembered a time when I saw two young men deep in a very bloody fight. I went straight up to them and split both of them a part. They stopped. I didn't shout. I felt no fear. Just a desire for them to stop hurting each other. I was with another who when we left the two young men was enraged with me for intervening. He had watched on in fear for himself and me. He said to me what if one of them had turned on you with a knife? Or had a gun? He said I was stupid because I did not think of my own safety or his. I responded that I wanted them to know that someone cared. That it was not OK. That I did not want them to hurt. I remember feeling this very strongly.

I also remember many a time when I was a child where my father would be submerged in a mad rage. And I use the word mad as I now consider he had lost his self and sanity. Such was his level of madness he had at one time almost killed my mother. And if I think if he had a gun when he 'lost it' what then? If someone had stepped in would love and compassion have touched his true self through the madness?

Back to the question. This pondering then led me to ask why were people so frequently posing this question. I began to realize that this question kept me in a mental bind/dead end, that saw the violent act in isolation. Could this question, this moral dilemma be in fact a trap which would not help in finding responses to violence? In fact in order to respond to violence and create peaceful loving living maybe what is needed is a different approach. And this could lead to different questions being asked. Could the question itself actually be part of the problem of how violence is seen?

Growing up in a violent family I have only recently began to appreciate how this has given me much insight, with regards to violence. This journey continues and so far has taken over 20 years of searching to understand. And I am sure I have more to learn, more healing will occur and with that further understanding. Key to this learning and discovery is how the violent act follows after a range of non physical violent behaviours. This abuse can come in the form of emotional, psychological and mental communications. The hit is like a confirmation of all that has been before. The violent physical act is like a locking of a door. And it's key is control carved out of fear.

The other main insight I learnt was that after I had become a victim of an abusive relationship was that I had internalised the oppressor/aggressor as well as the victim. Some describe this as a Shadow part. And that this Shadow had two faces both the oppressor and aggressor. Which like a cloaked figure whispers words; giving a warped view on the world. I also realized ~ How else could I have accepted someone else treating me like this if I had not this Shadow inside?. If I had not normalized violence. The healing for me was to see this cycle of violence. To see that I could step outside of the violence. I had choice. I had power.

I think we need to see physical violence as a symptom and not cause. If we do then I think we begin to see that violence is not just a physical act, but in fact part of a much more complex problem which we all can be locked into. Because we are all connected. And because we are all connected then we all have power to create positive change. Physical violence comes after a long history of behaviours which can be as subtle as a thought expressed in word or even a look. It is generational in families and in societies. If we see that violence is not an isolated act done by evil individuals, then we can also see the connections that led to the violence. We there by step out of blame and into sharing responsibility. This is an empowered place to be. A place of believing and knowing that we all can have a positive impact.

Violence is normalized and accepted in our society. Children are taught this at home and in school. The highs of the emotional intensity that we see daily in our press, on the TV, in our films is an addiction covering up pain, loss and isolation. It is deeply dysfunctional that violence is romanticised through endless disaster movies and violent computer games. So many have a need to forget they have a disconnection to true self, that is expressed through the numbing of pain that is created by and creates violence. It can be a vicious cycle.

So when we are given moral dilemmas like this question, I would suggest stepping back and asking why this question is being asked. What might be the hidden agendas? That in fact there is another way in responding which adds to further understanding. That address the causes. Enabling more ways to heal. More ways to step in earlier. More ways to prevent the violence because we will be more equipped to respond, having addressed potential wounds in ourselves and in our own relationships and ultimately in our societies. We can see how all of us can have an affect by sharing ownership and responsibility. We can step outside the duality of them and us. How though it might seem fear has the upper hand ~ healing is possible. We then will be more empowered ourselves and able to support one another, in being in a place of compassion. Out of Love.

Yes it can be painful thawing the ice. But unless we thaw our hearts not only will we not feel the pain inflicted on ourselves and other humans, but also our beautiful nature and planet.

After I had split the two young men up, I heard that they later on went back and started fighting again. This was when I was out of their view. So I leave with this thought what do I choose to focus on. That they continued with their violence or that for that moment they stopped. That they saw that some one cared?

I believe that we create life how we want it. So I believe in the power of love. I believe it is never impossible. I believe it is never too late.

So mote it be.

A link to Gene Sharp whose work has been so influential as has been read by activists in Egypt. The Albert Einstein Institution.
http://www.aeinstein.org/

and a wonderful book:
"Small Acts of Resistance. How Courage, Tenacity, and Ingenuity Can Change the World." Steve Crawshaw & John Jackson.

Turn On Your Light

2011-02-11T23:05:00.004Z

The new era is already here:
Here the new time begins anew.
The new era happens every day,
Every day is a new world,
A new calender.
All great moments, all great eras,
Are just every moment
And every day writ large.
Thousands of years of loving, failing, killing,
Creating, surprising, oppressing,
And thinking ought now to start
To bear fruit, to deliver their rich harvest.

Will you be at the harvest?
Among the gatherers of the fruits?
Then you must begin today to remake
Your mental and spiritual world,
And join the warriors and the celebrants
Of freedom , realisers of great dreams.

You can't remake the world
Without remaking yourself.
Each new era begins within.
It is an inward event,
With unspected possibilities
For inner liberation.
We could use it to turn on
Our inward lights.
We could use it to even the dark
And negative things positively.
We could use the new era
To clean our eyes,
To see the world differently,
To see ourselves more clearly.
Only free people can make a free world.
Infect the world with your light.
Help fulfil the prophecies.
Press forward the human genius.
Our future is greater than our past.

Ben Okri 1999
Found in Mental Flight.

The Wind One Brilliant Day by Antonio Machado

2011-02-07T23:09:00.003Z

The wind, one brilliant day, called
to my soul with an odor of jasmine.

"In return for the odor of my jasmine,
I'd like all the odor of your roses"

"I have no roses; all the flowers
in my garden are dead."

"Well then, I'll take the withered petals
and the yellow leaves and the waters of the fountain."

the wind left. And I wept. And I said to myself:
"What have you done to the garden that was entrusted to you?"

translated by Robert Bly

Daphnia pulex

2011-02-05T09:16:00.002Z

The common water flea, Daphnia pulex, has more genes than any other animal known - including humans scientists have discovered. Photo by Dr P Herbert

Tenderness

2011-01-16T15:53:00.003Z

"If you search for awakened heart, if you put your hand through your rib cage and feel for it, there is nothing there except for tenderness. You feel sore and soft, and if you open your eyes to the rest of the world, you feel tremendous sadness. This kind of sadness doesn't come from being mistreated. You don't feel sad because someone has insulted you or you feel impoverished. Rather, this experience of sadness is unconditioned. It occurs because your heart is completely exposed. There is no skin or tissue covering it; it is pure raw meat. Even if a tiny mosquito lands on it, you feel so touched. Your experience is raw and tender and so personal.
The genuine heart of sadness comes from feeling that your nonexistent heart is full. You would like to spill your heart's blood, give your heart to others. For the warrior, this experience of sad and tender heart is what gives birth to fearlessness. Conventionally, being fearless means that you are not afriad or that, if someone hits you, you will hit him back. However, we are not talking about that street-fighter level of fearlessness. Real fearlessness is the product of tenderness. It comes from letting the world tickle your heart, your raw and beautiful heart"

Shambhala ~ The Sacred Path of the Warrior by Chogyam Trungpa, p45-46
http://www.shambhala.org/

Brene Brown: The power of vulnerability | Video on TED.com

2011-01-12T18:49:00.007Z

"They believed what made them vulnerable made them beautiful"

"Our lives are a collection of stories, truths about who we are, what we believe, where we come from, how we can let go of what people think, and own our story, we gain access to our worthiness ~ the feeling that we are enough just as we are, and that we are worthy of love and belonging" Dr Brene Brown ~ 'The Hustle for Worthiness' DVD

Brene Brown: The power of vulnerability Video on TED.com

http://www.brenebrown.com/welcome

The Great Dream

2011-01-04T22:51:00.005Z

Goddess created humanity so she could know herself.

And so creation is a continous flowering into being.

"The deepest strata of the underworld include a state of being called "Sacred Land", also known as the Earth of Light of Blessed Isles. This state houses the Dreamer within the Land, often known as Lucifer, the sun at midnight, and the star within the stone...Faery Seership is concerned with reaching deep into and through the substance of the surface world to the state where the Lord of Light holds the original vision of the earth and her creatures in the sacred land. The Faery seer seeks to be as one with the Dreamer and to open this sacred land into the surface world thereby healing and re-vivifying it...The sacred land is the original vision of the world in its balanced and paradisiacal state. This state of being surfaces in all natural areas but is stronger in some..."the sacred land is the land the way God intended it to be ~ a Garden of Eden". This statement is in keeping with some of the deeper teachings of Faery Seership which say that the Garden of Eden receded into the inner worlds as humanity moved forward into the surface world. This is the mystical legend of the exile of Adam and Eve, the primal parents of humanity, from Paradise...In Faery Seership, humanity was not exiled from Eden for eternity. Rather, the unconditional availability of Eden was traded for the gift of free will. The post-exile shift in human condition now requires us to seek, find, and claim our place in Eden as an act of choice. To do this humanity must also reclaim its responsibility and accountability as caretakers of the sacred garden of Eden. "
The Faery Teachings by Orion Foxwood. p112-113.

South Uist

2011-01-02T17:16:00.001Z

A Short Adventure of a boy who dared to climb an apple tree

2010-12-21T20:15:00.006Z

Once upon a time there was a boy who was happy but for a nagging pain on the sole of his right foot, where a splinter had been lodged following climbing the old apple tree in his parents garden.
He wanted to look over the wall that stretched for miles and miles, surrounding the huge estate hiding behind many tall dark trees. He thought if he could get high enough he might be able to see through the tall dark trees.
He should have listened to his parents who warned him never to climb the apple tree. His mother said if he did; the terrible growling, snarling, saliva spitting, frothing dog would see him and scare him so much, that he would for ever and ever chase him in his dreams.
Surprisingly this did not stop him from climbing the apple tree, as he had never heard or seen the dog. In fact the more he thought about it, the more he came to the conclusion that there was and never had been a dog. This disbelief grew and grew to such an extent that he felt more alone than he could have imagined. It was then he realized that this was what people called a lie.
Worse still, he started having arguments with himself about whether there was a dog, because he had spent many years imagining what a terrible growling, snarling, saliva spilling, frothing dog would look like. And smell like. Over the years the hair of the dog had grown, as had his blood dripping yellow stained teeth.
So on this average quiet day he decided that he would look over the wall; so he climbed and climbed and climbed, and climbed as it was a very high tree. Anyway, he got to the top only to slip and fall. He awoke stunned with a pain in his foot which remained even when the splinter was removed; much to the confusion of the local physician.
It was from that day that Barefoot was his name because he could no longer wear any shoes; so bad was the pain. His father was the village shoe maker and try as hard as he could to design different shoes of all shapes and sizes; he could not make a pair of shoes that his son could wear without aggravating the pain.
His father went up to Barefoot and said he had run out of ideas, but he knew of a Master shoe maker in the Big City, who might be able to help him. He knew his son was scared and did not want to travel outside of the village and certainly not beyond the estate wall. But he did not know of any other way.
Finally Barefoot gathered up his courage and left for the Big City. The journey was far over rock, clay, grass, stone and sand. He saw amazing lands and incredible animals of earth, sky and water. So much colour and movement that filled his body and crowded his dreams. At times his feet became sore, but still he want on until eventually his feet became hardened to the hot and cold. At times he forgot the reason why he had travelled so far. At times he forgot the pain in his foot. He crossed rough seas of fire and ice, finally winding down the river to the mouth of the Big City.
Barefoot wandered the streets for 2 days amazed and shocked at all the strange sights and smells. However, on the second day 2 minutes past 4 o'clock he arrived at the Master shoe maker's shop. He stood looking up at the winding, twisting, moving, shaking, quivering stairs of the huge snake; wondering how he could catch the tail. He decided to make a huge leap and flung himself on. The stairs gave one almighty shake and then became still. Barefoot gingerly crept up and , as he touched each new step a different note sounded out until he reached the top to a cacophony of noise. He had been announced and the door swung open! Barefoot was greeted by the Master shoe maker.
The Master shoe maker was an old man with long white hair that merged from his head into his long white beard that trailed to the ground. The Master shoe maker greeted Barefoot as an old friend and listened carefully to Barefoot's story. In response he said he would consider making shoes for Barefoot on condition that he work for him for a year and a day, and learn that shoe makers trade.
Days, weeks and months passed until that final day arrived and the Master shoe maker announced the shoes were finished.
"And they will stop the pain in my foot?" asked Barefoot.
"Oh no, they can't do that!" replied the Master shoe maker.
"What old man, I know you are a magician. You promised you would make me shoes. So what's the use of these then?" shouted Barefoot as he flung the shoes back in the Master shoe maker's face.
"Well, they will stop you getting more splinters" said the Master shoe maker.
"What's the use of that? Splinters don't bother me. I can just pull them out. It's the pain in my foot that won't go away!" exclaimed Barefoot.
"But don't you know, you are cured of the pain" replied the Master shoe maker.
"What, are you mad? No I am not cured!" Barefoot at this point was barely containing himself from punching the old man in the face.
"Well, if the pain was that bad how did you manage to walk all those miles?"
Barefoot puffed himself up to tower of the Master shoe maker and replied;
"Because I am strong and brave!"
"Um, so I see" said the Master shoe maker not looking convinced.
"Yes"
"You sure?"
"YES!" yelled Barefoot.
"I don't believe you" replied the Master shoe maker calmly.
"You calling me a liar?!"
Barefoot at this point was shaking with rage then realized in utter amazement that the Master shoe maker was shaking too; because he was desperately trying to hide that he was laughing.
The Master shoe maker then straightened himself up, grew a few inches taller, pulled off his beard and exclaimed;
"Well done my son! You have journeyed far and long. Over come many fears, many challenges and learned many lessons. So you too can now become the Master shoe maker like you father!"
Barefoot was silent for a while and then replied;
"Thank you father. I am no Master shoe maker. I shall not take your name. Barefoot I am and Barefoot I shall remain!".

By Elizabeth Silver fox

To A Queer Kumquat

2010-12-19T17:42:00.002Z

Oh MASCARPHONE
My Kumquat
Gingerly in your presence
Twas a sticky date with those pecan petals
It turned me
A greengage fool for you my love!
Your Creme Anglaise
Doth make even a coconut pound cake rise!
You poach apricots
Then daily with a fistful of pistachios
Come clean
Don't just Creme Anglaise me
Creme Fraiche me!
Almond tart me
And my passion fruit
Will surely plum jam
Trifle and prune is me
You will crystallise
Then caramelise
And sear me with
Your quince apace
Henceforth love bring rosewater
To my fig quarter
Oh me Kumquat
Me
Oh me
Mascarpone
Me
Oh me
Creme Fraiche
Me
Oh Oh me
Queen Baklava
Drizzle my roasted plums
And my mango is yours

by Julie Mullen
Erotic Poetry for Vegans & Vegetarians

A Lesson in economics

2010-12-17T22:38:00.005Z

One morning a Russian man wandered into a hotel in a village and announced he was interested in a room for the evening, and left a $100 deposit, but said he wanted to check out other lodging first. The hotel owner pocketed the money, and remembered he owed the cook $100 and paid him straight away. Meanwhile the cook owed money to the butcher and gave him the $100. The butcher owed money to his girlfriend and paid her. The woman then ran to the hotel and paid her outstanding bill with the $100. A few minutes later the Russian man came back to the hotel and said he had changed his mind, and the hotel manager refunded his money. Meanwhile, everybody in town was paid off. This is how economics is supposed to work.

www. thefourwinds.com ~ Alberto Villoldo

2010-10-31T19:01:00.002Z

"The desire to break the silence with constant human noise is, I believe, precisely an avoidance of the sacred terror of that divine encounter"
Matsuo Basho, Silence ~ via Crashingly Beautiful

2010-10-17T18:18:00.002+01:00

Can you hear me raining
my cup is full
and I am dancing on the rim
silver fox

Isle of Lewis 2010

2010-10-17T17:06:00.004+01:00

2010-10-17T16:50:00.001+01:00

2010-10-17T16:44:00.001+01:00

2010-10-17T16:34:00.002+01:00

2010-10-17T16:29:00.002+01:00

2010-10-17T16:23:00.001+01:00

The Cinematic Orchestra - All Things to All Men

2010-10-03T23:05:00.003+01:00

"In mythos and fairy tales, deities and other great spirits test the hearts of humans by showing up in various forms that disguise their divinity. They show up in robes, rags, silver sashes, or with muddy feet. They show up with skin dark as old wood, or in scales made of rose petal, as a frail child, as a lime-yellow old woman, as a man who cannot speak, or as an animal who can. The great powers are testing to see if humans have yet learned to recognize the greatness of soul in all its varying forms."

Clarissa Pinkola Estes ~ Women Who Run with the Wolves

"Redemption comes only after we have moved through the horrors of our present situation to the better world that lies beyond it. By confronting the problem as courageously as we can and at the same time presenting alternatives, our barriers to clarity, including our false hopes, may crumble to reveal previously unseen possibilities"

Derrick Jensen ~ A Language Older Than Words

2010-10-03T23:00:00.000+01:00

re~blogged from Crashingly Beautiful

Are you ready to be changed?

2010-09-29T23:22:00.003+01:00

http://alunathemovie.com/en/contact.html

http://www.nativespiritfoundation.org/?cat=10

Por Dentro

2010-09-08T20:42:00.002+01:00

"When we lose contact with our inner world, negative things start happening; our personal garden dries out and the flowers and fruits disappear. You see a bird inside the girl. This bird represents that natural sense of direction that we all have, it's some sort of guide that helps us find our way through life. The bird can only be alive if the garden is alive, because they need each other."

by elsita

the heArt of Papercuts

2010-08-19T19:35:00.003+01:00

"We are born of the stars,
part of the wider realms
and all between.
Life is connection.
Remember, we travel the stars
and feed on the Sun and Moon.
The Ancestors walked
with courage and huge minds
to anchor the spirit of
mountain peaks to the spirit of
the stars, and called on their
pulsing light to enhance life.
That was the gift they sent
forward in time to serve
those who followed.
That was the promise
they honoured"

*
Song of the Old Tides ~ Barry Brailsford

2010-08-18T21:48:00.002+01:00

"We are not human beings having spiritual experiences,

we are spiritual beings having human experiences"

Yogi Bhajan

Cadair Idris

2010-08-18T19:17:00.019+01:00

"Honour the power of the mountains, be humble beside the still waters, let the spirit of the land reach within to greet you. Mountains mirrored over water brings us into another tide on another side"

'Song of the Tides' ~ Barry Brailsford.

Books by Barry Brailsford ~ http://www.stoneprint.co.nz/index.htm

Dolgoch

2010-08-17T22:54:00.006+01:00

"Each little death, each letting go of something that no longer serves us well, opens the doors to higher learning.

Each little death lightens our load, frees us of burdens that may have become to heavy.

Each little death brings more light into our life"

'Wisdom of the Four Winds' ~ Barry Brailsford

Llanfihangel-y-pennant

2010-08-17T22:36:00.002+01:00

Walk to Castell y Bere

2010-08-17T22:22:00.002+01:00

2010-08-04T19:43:00.004+01:00

I am delighted to find I have been awarded this blogging award. The most recent rules for the award are:
1. Thank the blogger that gave you the award.
Thankyou to Moonroot at http://moonroot.blogspot.com/
2. Sum up your blogging philosophy, motivation, experience, using 5 words.
Mine are
Creativity, Discovery, Exploration, Sharing, Community
3. Pass the award on to 5 fabulous bloggers with substance. I'm happy to bestow this award (in no particular order) on the following fabulous blogs which always have something worth saying, and say it well:
* Sacred Graffiti
* Painting Life with Words
* The Naked Soul
* Energy Doorways
* The Spiritual Journey of a Somerset Pagan

2010-08-02T06:14:00.001+01:00

"To be truly radical is to make hope possible, rather than despair convincing."
Raymond Williams ~ http://www.darkoptimism.org/

2010-07-28T07:49:00.006+01:00

"There is a language older by far and deeper than words. It is the language of bodies, of body on body, wind on snow, rain on tree, wave on stone. It is the language of dream, gesture, symbol, memory. We have forgotton this language. We do not even remember that it exists. "

A Language Older than Words ~ Derrick Jensen.

Silver Fox July 2010

Place to Be

2010-06-29T22:22:00.034+01:00

by Kindra Clineff {1}

Where is the Secret Garden in this City, shall I follow the voices of children?

So how much have I chosen this life? How much am I connected to others in this web of weaving. We talk of bloodlines. Of patterns of behaviour and learning being passed down. How much of those patterns are memories in our shared blood. How am I a memory of my ancestors; an imprint of ghosts reliving. And at what point does one life begin and another end. Is my life my own or how much of my life is a shared gift.

In this city lost, with souls rubbing shoulders pretending that they didn't choose this. Pretending not to care.

Living in a city I am increasingly seeing children who are not socialized with an inability to communicate and behave within different environments, contexts and people. I am seeing more children emotionally charged and reactive. Unable to be happy with themselves let alone their environment and others. I understand for many Life has been a threat and they are trapped in flight, freeze or run. And for many this learned survival is a lesson hard to re-learn.

Some see but I am not one of them that this as isolated problem with certain families. This is a growing symptom of our country where Margaret Thatcher proclaimed "There is no such thing as society, there are individual men and women and there are families". In this statement where is the desire for community? Where is shared responsibility? Where is shared accountability?

I learnt in my psychotherapy training that it was only possible for a group therapist to keep in mind no more than 10 with comfort or at a stretch some argue a maximum of 15. This led me to pondering on whether there was also a geographical limitation on how much an individual could relate to/keep in mind. And so for me this combination of number of people and space are key to understanding how community is created. So following this train of thought I wondered how in a city or in country I could feel part of a community.

Recently I was listening to a BBC Radio4 debate on ethics where two very similar scenarios were given. First one: a person is given the choice of saving 5 people from a runaway trolley/train or another person who was standing away from the other 5. In order to save the 5 they would need to push a button to redirect that trolley/train and in doing so would kill a person they did not know. In the second scenario the person has to physically push the single person onto the track to save the 5 other people. Apparently when given these two scenarios more people are able to say that would push the button than push the person. This ethical dilemma is called the proximity question. And since hearing this question I have been concerned at the mentality which created such question. This reminds me of the experiments that psychologists did on baby monkeys to see how they survived without a mother ~ either with a soft cuddly toy or not. I had found myself tied in mental knots trying to figure out this ethical dilemma until the light came on and I realized that ~ We are dealing with the wrong questions.

This is a made up scenario. Last week I was in a situation in which I had not chosen to be part of. Where the people who I was with lied to me. They set up the situation partly through the rues of getting me to leave the scene temporarily. And so I was unwittingly implemented as I had come with them. On my return I was witness to police racial/class brutality against two 13 year old girls. I did not know where to turn. How to help the girls. I was frightened for myself too and had no where to run as more and more people came involved. Family and neighbours watched on. The girls were taken away in a police van and I left standing with the family and neighbours. With their mother asking why the police had been violent to her daughters.

This quote has been inspirational for me this last week as I struggled with what I felt was my impotence. As I have questioned what more could I have done? What more can I do now other than what I have done including making a formal complaint and talking to others helping their hearts to thaw and feel their hurt and outrage of that incident:

I have come to believe that every one of us is an activist, and that every action taken in the name of interconnection ~ every action that brings us closer to ourselves, to each other, to the planet ~ births a better world.

Marisa Handler {2}

So when I see a person I do not know in pain, do I walk on by because I do not know them?When I hear that the tube train I am on is delayed and diverted because someone had fallen onto the tracks. Do I feel annoyed that I will be delayed by a person whose face I did not see, miles away from where I am? Or can I feel those threads that exist inside and outside of me shake and shiver. Daring to thaw my heart.

When our children rebel and refuse to answer the questions that we set them. Maybe we need to ask ourselves whether we are asking the wrong questions. If they answer in rudeness or anger it is time for us to step back and pause because we might just be asking the wrong questions. And those questions inform actions. Too often people presume and assume to know and understand. Have others speak our answers to our questions ~ the wrong questions.

So I hope to learn answers to questions that I did not know and are beginning to understand.

{1} http://scienceblogs.com/bioephemera/2010/03/spider_spiral.php
{2} http://www.marisahandler.com/home.html

2010-06-19T10:05:00.005+01:00

'Guardians of Being' ~ art Patrick McDonnell, words Eckhart Tolle

Holy Grail of the Unconscious

2010-06-13T23:15:00.015+01:00

The very first book that I read that guided me through psychotherapy and spirituality when I was 17 was 'Man and His Symbols' by Carl Jung.

Now Jung's infamous book 'The Red Book' has been translated and published. To say that I am excited would be bit of an understatement! It is his diary of his own journey through his underworld. Unfinished and locked away. There is still ccontroversy over its publication.

"Some people feel that nobody should read the book, and some feel that everybody should read it. The truth is, nobody really knows. Most of what has been said about the book — what it is, what it means — is the product of guesswork, because from the time it was begun in 1914 in a smallish town in Switzerland, it seems that only about two dozen people have managed to read or even have much of a look at it.
Of those who did see it, at least one person, an educated Englishwoman who was allowed to read some of the book in the 1920s, thought it held infinite wisdom — “There are people in my country who would read it from cover to cover without stopping to breathe scarcely,” she wrote" (1)

Here are 3 links:

(1) New York Times Article

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/20/magazine/20jung-t.html?pagewanted=1&_r=2

PDF preview

http://www.gnosis.org/library/The-Red-Book.pdf

2 Talks at Treadwells

http://www.treadwells-london.com/lectures_and_launches.html

Quest for the Grail brief intro 1 persons journey

http://www.lunaea.com/words/grailstory2.html

2010-06-12T21:02:00.047+01:00

http://www.astronomygcse.co.uk/

From moment to moment
I am waiting
for something to happen

*
to wake up from this dream
and
live this life

*
while I hear voices
stolen brutally
dare I breathe happiness
*
must I dream to forget
or must I live
to remember

and so I remember

every mother

gave birth to us all

daring to live

this life

given

silver Fox

5 Agreements

2010-06-12T11:57:00.010+01:00

Be Impeccable with you word

Don't take anything personally

Don't make assumptions

Always do your best

Be sceptical, but learn to listen

The Fifth Agreement: A Toltec Wisdom Book by Don Miguel Ruiz & Don Jose Ruiz

http://www.miguelruiz.com/

Raven Returns to Dover after 120 years!

2010-06-11T20:28:00.064+01:00

Call of the Raven by Jarmo Manninen

http://www.luontokuvat.net/index.htm

The Raven returning to the White Cliffs of Dover after 120 years {both icons for Britain now again linked} previously hunted from extinction from this part of England; Fills me with hope after a week of hysteria following a suspected incident of an urban fox attacking a human baby. As us humans further domesticate ourselves taking over more and more green space, and so alienating ourselves from nature. We forget that this story is repeated over and over. Be it tigers, elephants, polar bears, wolves or foxes. It took time but the Raven is now a protected bird. So what has been the Raven's story, myth and medicine?

Raven is found in myths all around the world. A powerful figure. Linked with creation and Shamans. A shape shifter, transformer, bringer of light out of the darkness, creator of the world egg, messenger and trickster to name just a few key elements of Raven's medicine and power.

It is Bigger than the British Buzzard. A beautiful, formidable and cunning bird.

Linked with Celtic mythology of Bran the Blessed, primordial Deity and protector of Britain ~ whose name means 'Raven'. "A master of the Isle of Britain, he is a cauldron-God, associated with a cauldron of regeneration which would revive the slain while leaving them voiceless. His cauldron destroyed, and he mortally wounded in a war to rescue his sister Branwen, he instructed his adherents to decapitate him and, after many travels, bear the head to London and bury it, where it would become a defense and a protection to the whole Isle. " (1)

So Legend says Bran's head was cut off and buried on the White Mount of London now the place of the Tower of London. Here lives the belief that England will fall should the Raven's depart. I still find it curious for many reasons, as well as cruel; that even today there are keepers of Raven's at the Tower who clip the Raven's wings to stop them departing.

Raven is also connected with Celtic Goddess Morrigan of darkness/night/battle/fertility/death and lover of the son of Lugh. Raven is also directly associate with the God Lugh ~ bringer of light, divine ruler. Raven a bridge between the worlds and between darkness and light. The fear of Raven has been mirrored by our interpretation of Shamans and Witches.

Morrigan and Lugh are Deities associated with Giant Semi-God race of Tuatha Dé Danann named the Shining Ones by W.B Yeats. They have close associations with the Angelic race who fell to earth and gave birth to the Nephilim ~ founded in Middle Eastern myths (referred to in the Bible and Book of Enoch}. Both are described as a beautiful frightening powerful giant race, with god like powers who taught humankind the arts such as smith craft and medicine.

***

References:
General Intro to world myths of Raven ~ http://www.ravenfamily.org/nascakiyetl/obs/rav1.html

How to identify Raven and much much more! ~

http://www.shades-of-night.com/aviary/index.html

W.B. Yeats 'A Vision'

http://www.yeatsvision.com/Sitemap.html
Lugh ~
http://www.celtnet.org.uk/gods_l/lugus.html
Morrigan ~

http://www.pantheon.org/articles/m/morrigan.html
Raven and Dover ~
http://www.thisiskent.co.uk/news/Raven-chicks-reared-Dover-Kent-fledglings-120-years/article-1135266-detail/article.html

Bran ~

http://www.realmagick.com/articles/36/2036.html
Raven and Tower of London ~ http://www.forteantimes.com/features/articles/879/myths_of_the_raven.html
Tuatha Dé Danann ~
http://www.timelessmyths.com/celtic/danann.html
http://www.shee-eire.com/magic&mythology/races/tuatha-de-danann/page1.htm

(1) Bran the Blessed by Obsidian ~

( http://www.realmagick.com/articles/01/901.html
Nephilim ~
I recommend 'From the Ashes of Angels' by Andrew Collins though at times he makes leaps with his conclusions it is a very interesting read and has many references.

2010-06-08T21:31:00.004+01:00

by *Skia

Queen Hornet

2010-06-06T21:03:00.050+01:00

http://www.bwars.com/ ~ Queen, In woodland below the Wrekin, Shropshire, 2005 by Nigel Jones

In 2 weeks I have seen 2 Queen Hornets. 1st in Hungary. 2nd nr Yeoford Devon. Both times I was completely transfixed. Amber Gold red colour. Such powerful confidence. Strong. I remember how the mention of Hornets people quake and shake.
So why was I so at ease? What was I missing? Or were other's missing something?
Tigers on wing. To be respected. Their beauty admired.

Some species of Queen Hornet apparently have enough lethal venom to kill a human. Hornets can kill bees and wasps. So everything including us has a place. Us who are at the top of the food chain.

The Queen and her female workers maintain the nest. Shamanically a Hornet would connect with female warrior energy, sisterhood and understanding female societies and communal living. I am very excited that I am meeting Hornet.
And with this {shamanic/spirit} medicine I experience working on befriending my shadow side which is fiercely protective. So many insects and animals have had so much shadow projected onto them do we see who/what they are?
I wonder at the misleading shadow we cast onto them. I wonder that I am connecting with ancient as my dear friend said today Hornets are mostly to be found in ancient woodland. She also told me an amazing story of when she first saw a Hornet she did not know they existed and watched with awe as she heard it's jaws crunching eating a wasp! And I wonder whether as man has reduced ancient wilderness so maybe the Hornet is coming into more domesticated spheres...Would that affect the medicine of the Hornet...Would many more meet that medicine?...
With this thought of my need my desire to meet wilderness of my heart. This year I have been faced with what I would have assumed as other's similar desire, has been at times glamour in service to the ego. At worst this has a dangerous echo of colonialism. Misunderstanding and misusing other oppressed people's life/culture/being which is inter-connected with the land.
I refer to many westerners after apparently seeking out indigenous shamanic teachers, using their experience to sell and promote themselves. Some ask whether you have trained with an aboriginal/indigenous shaman or 'their' shaman~ there by clearly defining the 'pecking order' and offering something which you can only get from them.
When I have met indigenous healers/shamans which I have learned a lot from; they have been very down to earth, average person/every day people. They have a job. They earn respect. And do not separate out their job/role from life and other people. I experience them of having studied bloody hard with open hearted and open eyed curiosity. Like our wonderful British naturalists who sit hours on end watching and observing nature. Tired and aching. On their own. They are rewarded by such amazing knowledge and I believe in time gifted with wisdom.
What I am describing is being in service. Full of love and therefore full of power. And I think that westerners have much to learn about what power is. Power not connected with ego.
I am hearing too often western people describing themselves as Shamans when I am not clear what their intention is.
It has been a journey for me to witness women within the alternative spiritual subcultures promoting themselves as a business. We trip into not only the tricky area of £ for spirituality but also the tricky area of the previously oppressed, marginalised and misunderstood ~ women's power and spirituality.

For me my journey this year has been about reclaiming my authentic spiritual woman self. I have been working with not giving my power away to other female figures in my desire to heal the wounded daughter that comes from a line of mothers and daughters who have been abondoned. My journey has been to see this ancestral thread. A woman's wound. That thread, that blood which longs to bleed into the earth and belong.
This journey of healing the woman's wound has connected me with a desire to connect with the Divine feminine. That which is woven inside my womb, vulva and heart. In my blood. That vibrant hot red energy. That song.
And so I have been meeting Queen Hornet. A truly humbling experience.
And with that, dare I connect with that power. Not distort. Not demonise ~ internally or externally. Be that either an unclaimed part of my self or another woman.

For we are all mirrors and 'our worst teachers are our best teachers'

I am reminded that to connect with Divine it is that volcano that burning star that burning sting. Fire. Red. Orange. Yellow. Sun. Hot.

I am reminded of the wonder, diversity, power and beauty of Her Divinity.

For an interesting read on a related subject ~ "Personality" by W.E.Butler

http://www.servantsofthelight.org/knowledge/butler-personality.html

Yeoford ~ Devon

2010-06-06T20:42:00.008+01:00

Along the Tarka line ~ www.trailsfromthetrack.com

Kew Gardens

2010-05-26T22:47:00.005+01:00

Cherry Tree

http://www.kew.org/

Hungary

2010-05-26T18:46:00.009+01:00

Jewish Quarter

Nocturne

2010-05-26T18:31:00.003+01:00

" Where do dreams happen when we can't sleep?".....

A film by Nataasha van Kampen

Buzz....

2010-05-15T15:03:00.005+01:00

Buzz... A Celebration of British Bees & Their Flowers

An exhibition of Bee Paintings and Drawings by Valerie Littlewood

1st to 26th June 2010

Lumen Gallery, 88 Tavistock Place, WC1H 9RS London

http://www.herbsociety.org.uk/hg-ba10-buzz-british-bees-exhibition.htm

1 Giant Leap - Wounded In All The Right Places (Feat. K.D. Lang)

2010-05-13T21:24:00.000+01:00

Wounded Angel ~ Emily Young 2003 ~ Kew

2010-05-13T20:38:00.029+01:00

And the Angel loved us so much

His wings burnt as his passion and love for us grew

As he fell.

Knowing that as deep as he sang

Into our hearts of the earth.

The nearer we were to remembering our own wings

Beating so close to our beloved.

As we look inside we come alive to the night.

As we look to the night we come alive to the light.

As we look into the earth we remember the star burning bright.

In our hearts

My beloved.

We are all Wounded Angels

Silver Fox May 2010

2010-05-13T20:35:00.023+01:00

A doodle during 3 1/2 hour initial child protection meeting ~ the decision was to place the child on the cp register. I had fought for months to have this meeting. A team of 15 professionals some of whom I had never met before crushed into a room ~ the number alone I would have thought a clear enough sign of the severity of the situation. However we battled on until the decision could be made.

I remind myself there is change.

So alongside this process I drew~ a root and anchor during the process. I wasn't fully aware of what was emerging until the end. I was for a while resistant to a growing black shape. I thought ahh an ugly blob...growing darkness! Then I saw what had emerged ~ a shape dancing, leaping, stretching.

To the right a shield made of a cobweb.

I reflect on how spiders hold this light and dark. So often I have struggled with how I percieve spiders. How much emotion and human fantasy spiders have had projected onto them. And I remember how I have struggled in being with this family. How I have percieved how comfortable they seem with their situation. How often they all have said, including the child, that they want everyone to leave them alone.

I contemplate how perception creates reality.

Spiders with there many feet are so sensitive. Spinning webs that glisten with dew. So light but so strong. They have an important place in nature and are filled with beauty.

2010-05-13T19:48:00.000+01:00

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